I realized today that we cannot be fully open to what someone is saying if we are sitting on the edge of our seat waiting to negate someone’s words. If we are not willing to hear out a person and the entirety of their message then the conversation was over before it started. It is only after examining and welcoming a new perspective that we are able to challenge ourselves enough to consider something we may never have considered before. We are so sure we have all the answers that we’ve stopped asking questions and there alone lies one of the biggest problems of all. We can remain stuck or we can be open to grow. We can talk or we can listen. We can welcome information or we can insist we already know what there is to know. When is the last time you took an opportunity to open yourself up to something new…a new idea, a new belief, A new situation? Ask yourself, how open are you to learning and changing?
Sometimes life slows down long enough to catch up with the people we love. I am grateful for that today.
Someone made a comment to me earlier that really started me thinking. I can’t remember the exact words but the point being made was that I have my health and can pay my bills so my life must be good. What exactly does it mean for life to be good? I imagine a good life looks quite different to each and everyone of us. I am struggling with a torn meniscus and experiencing some real anxiety over trying my best to parent a teenager who seems to be lost. Sure I look healthy and yes the bills are paid but my heart feels heavy and I feel it racing. I think what disturbs me most is people think they know but they really don’t. They don’t take the time to know. They don’t really want to know. Our relationships seem so superficial these days. It makes me sad that we live in a world where people tell us how we are instead of being interested enough to ask and then hear the story beneath the words. Let this be a reminder not to assume we know what’s going on with anyone else. Life may be very different for someone than it “appears” to be. The eyes don’t always get it right. Don’t assume anything because they appear healthy. Health involves the body, mind and the spirit. Don’t assume because someone can pay bills that they can pay a second of attention to anything else because they are consumed with anxiety, dread, depression, hopelessness. Maybe my life is good but I may not be as healthy as you believe. I can have a good life in spite of everything because I make the choice to do so. Let’s just stop assuming anything and ask. Listen. Encourage. Support. Reach out. You don’t know but maybe you should.
I saw a meme today of a person hanging onto a rope tied to the bottom of a hot air balloon. The caption read, let go or be dragged. It inspired this post.
Today I will not allow myself to believe I am a victim.
Today I will focus on the blessings in my life.
Today I will remind myself that hope and despair are both a choice.
Today I will focus on the light at the end of the tunnel and know that I am headed in the right direction.
Today I will take a deep breath and repeat the words “it will be okay.”
Today I will look in the mirror and remind myself of who I am.
Today I will choose hope and faith and give God what I cannot handle alone.
Today I will be easy on myself and choose love.
Today it is October. A season of change. I welcome it with open arms.
Today I will embrace the peace and freedom that comes with free falling as I release my grip on this rope.
Today I decide.
Whatever you are struggling with today, know that you are not alone. You are strong and everything you need is everything you are.
I haven’t been feeling like myself lately. Something’s been missing and I’ve lost a few steps when it comes to having any enthusiasm. I realize I gave up the best parts of myself when I stopped blogging and going to yoga. Those were 2 things that kept me balanced and the scales are so tipped the wrong way, I pray I have the strength to tip them back the right way. Ebb and flow is a real thing and with that knowledge I find comfort in the fact that this phase too shall pass. If you feel lost, do what makes you feel found. Set your soul back on fire and get some zip back in your step. You are in control. Sometimes you just forget.
On those days where fear seems stronger than faith and despair wins out over hope, remember who you are…
You are strength
You are balance
You are love
You are perseverance
You are a fighter
You are a survivor
You are a rock, a pillar, a mountain.
You will get through this. Just remember to breathe. One day, one minute, one breath at a time.
Sometimes I forget where I end and where my kids begin. It is both beautiful and tragic the connection between a mother and a child. Try as I may to disconnect, nights like this it seems nearly impossible. There is a very fine line between being a nagging parent and encouraging independence. I don’t want to spend useless hours worrying about my kids but when they give me reason to worry what choice do I have? I don’t want to stay in their business but when they are slacking in their responsibilities how do I turn my back? With each grouping of years comes a new set of challenges and the teenage years are the most difficult for me. It’s hard to find the sweet spot when someone toggles between striving to be an adult yet acting like an irresponsible child. I pray these nights of worry and insomnia will eventually become a thing of the past but that feeling deep inside my stomach that goes hand in hand with a mother’s intuition is sometimes too painful to ignore. No one talks about the challenges of parenting. We are quick to brag about our kids straight A’s or the award they won in the pool or on the field but how comfortable are we admitting the things that scare us half to death? How often do we support one another when a kid makes a bad choice or neglects responsibilities or gets caught in a series of disappointing lies? How terrifying is it knowing we may have failed them? Who is there to help us survive the hard times, the times we feel we are doing a horrible job and all hope seems to be lost? Who will listen when our heart is pounding violently in our chest and the mind chatter in our head has us spinning out of control? Parenting is not easy especially when we are forced to do it with little or no support. Sure these years will pass but sometimes the days feel painfully long. Reach out and support a fellow parent today. I can only guess how much that could mean to someone struggling to do their best. I see you. I feel you. I understand.