1) Writes his name on his quart of chocolate milk, and draws a black line with a sharpie so he knows if anyone’s been drinking it
2) Uses double sided tape on the bottom of his alarm clock, so when you dust it, it will be facing the direction he likes it
3) He’s on his way to a restaurant he picked, and when everyone starts to complain, he pulls the car over over to the side of road and says he’s not going to move until someone tells him where to go
4) Tells you he hasn’t seen the remote, and later you find it in his pocket
5) Falls asleep with the tv remote in their hand so no one can change the channel, even after he’s fast asleep
6) He asks you where you want to go, and you respond differently than he was hoping, so he says “forget it we’re not going anywhere”
7) Comes back from the concession stand with 2 beers and 2 hotdogs, and after finishing it all says ” Oh, did you want something?”
8) Would rather have earwax oozing from his earlobes, than use the last Q-tip in the container that he’d have to fill back up.
9) He is bragging he did the laundry, and when you slip on your favorite shirt you’re not sure if you gained 30 pounds or if your shirt shrunk 3 sizes smaller.
10) When he hides the thin mints on top of the refrigerator because he knows you’re only 5 feet tall.