I used to love being surrounded by people and activity, the busier my life, the better it was. As I get older though, I have really learned to appreciate quieter moments. I have come inward and discovered that true peace comes from within. I am content to look around me and take it all in. I realize now why some of my memories from younger years are so vague or even worse, forgotten. I was so distracted. I was running from here to there, rushing through the moments and paying little attention to the things that really mattered. Now, I will often sit in a place a little bit longer to take it all in. I breath it in with all my senses and I allow the time it takes to leave an imprint on my heart. I used to just walk away and now I turn around several times to take one last look.
I used to be ruled by my emotions and I would steer myself into the eye of conflict. Now, I let people fight their own battles and I sit on the sidelines waiting for them to come back around. I realize we spend years struggling against our own thoughts and being blurred by the line of our truth and the real truth. I realize, so little is about me, and it keeps me from getting sucked into a story line where I really do not play a part.
You live and you learn. You learn that forgiveness is one the greatest tools you will ever carry in your bag of survival. You learn that it feels so much better to love then it does to carry the heavy burden of resentment and hate. You learn that you always have a choice and the most important choice you will ever make is choosing the right perspective. If the view looks grim from where you are standing, you have got to move your feet to get to a new place. The only way that view stays the same is if you chose to remain in that same spot. I’ve learned that everyone is only human. We carry baggage and we are scarred by the relationships that have damaged us. We say and do things we don’t mean but at the end of the day we all live with the same regrets. We all want love. We want to love the ones around us and we want their love in return. I’ve learned that not everyone is capable of expressing love but each and everyone of us deserves to feel it. I’ve learned that we all do the best we can do and some of us are just better at it than others. I’ve learned that the most rewarding thing we can do is to forgive ourselves. Perfection is a mirage and we waste so much of our lifetime trying to grab it in our helpless hands. It’s okay to be flawed. It’s okay to be broken. Love yourself just as you are. There is only one you and that idea alone makes you special and unique. If you’ve wasted years of your life, start today to live. Every day is another chance to start again. Time is so precious and we must cherish it. It takes practice but the more attention you give to it, the better you will get at making more and more moments count.
I’ve learned to love through the tough times. I’ve learned its worth getting up at 5:30 to see the sunrise. I’ve learned a hike with a view is good for the soul. I’ve learned to live with no regrets and to keep moving forward because that is the only direction guaranteed to take me to a new and exciting place. I’ve learned to laugh at myself and be light hearted. I’ve learned to play no matter what my age. I’ve learned to be less serious and more passionate. I’ve learned to be open to each day as it comes, to embrace my past and not get too anxious about my future. I’ve learned that the only thing that is constant is change and gripping at something to keep it the same will never work. I’ve learned that the best days and the best moments are often unplanned and slowly but surely, I am learning to just go with the flow. There is always so much more to learn ….