Don’t equate your self-worth with how well you do things in life. You aren’t what you do. If you are what you do, then when you don’t … you aren’t.
I repeat this quote to myself every time I allow someone to define and judge me for what I do or don’t do. I am so much more than my college degree. I am more than a mom, a wife, a daughter, my position or lack of. I am a human being, unique and beautiful despite what others may choose to see. I have value. I am amazing for who I am on the inside, the outside and everything in between. I am worthy. I am amazing for who I am not for what I do.
So I had no idea what to write about today since the letter for the A to Z challenge is W but lucky enough, the words fell into place. One thing I realized today is that when you have been emotionally asleep for quite a while, walking through Vegas is just the place to wake you up. The sights, the sounds, the people watching are really invigorating. I took off on my own this morning exploring and checking things out. I wondered how different this Monday would feel if I was at home doing the same old same old. I know I’ve said this before but it is worth saying again. It is so important to change things up and not fall into the trap of repeating the same day over and over again. It is so amazing to have something on your calendar to look forward to and traveling makes everyone feel good. Just being somewhere else can leave you feeling so free, inspired, rejuvenated, healed. So, walking really is good for the soul and when you take a brisk walk in Vegas on a cool morning before the crowds hit the streets, there really is nothing better.
I was riding home today when it really hit me. Sometimes to appreciate the sunshine we have to spend some time in the rain. That is how depression feels. You are stuck in the storm and you have no other choice then to live in the darkness. Today I felt happy, really, really happy for the first time in a very long time. That dread, that doom and gloom was left behind as I glanced in my rear view mirror and left it behind. One thing I know for sure is when you struggle with depression, feeling happy, really happy is a blessing from God when it finally comes along. I can’t help but wonder if feeling so sad is a blessing in disguise because when happiness finally bites you on the backside, there are no words to describe the appreciation you feel. The bottom line is there will be good days and there will be bad days. There is a reason and a purpose for both. But when you get a good day, embrace it. Be grateful and feel the sun on your face. The rain, the storm will eventually pass and then you can bask in the sun again.
“They blame those who remain silent, they blame those speak much, they blame those who speak in moderation. There is none in the world who is not blamed.”- Buddha
Thought this one was worth sharing. Do you play the blame game?
My daughter told me a story about a misunderstanding she had with a friend today that left the friend in tears. Tears mom….really so annoying. Those were her words. I tried my best to explain to her that when people are hurt, especially sensitive people, they cannot help it if the tears start to flow. I urged her to respect the sensitivity of others and to not disregard it because she didn’t see a reason to be upset. It is in my instinctual nature to share in someone’s pain. When I see someone who is genuinely distraught, my heart breaks right along with them. I am trying to teach her that if someone feels hurt, she needs to accept and respect their feelings. The only thing worse than feeling hurt is someone, especially a friend, telling you you shouldn’t feel that way.
People who are not sympathetic, understanding and compassionate are just plain ugly. I don’t care how beautiful you are on the outside, if you are insensitive to the feelings of others, you are ugly period.
What about you? Do you know anyone who is ugly?
The seed of suffering in you may be strong, but don’t wait until you have no more suffering before allowing yourself to be happy.
Thich Nhat Hanh
When I read this quote, it completely changed the way I look at myself. I have been on this quest lately to find myself and work on some painful issues that have been holding me back from my own happiness. I am working hard, trying to let go of what was and what will be and simple just be. Happiness isn’t on the other side of this or the other side of that. Happiness isn’t waiting around the next corner. Happiness is right now underneath those feeling that are drowning it out. Be happy now. That is how we are meant to be.
This is a response to the daily prompt today to write a list from The Daily Post
1) I love interacting with people and making new friends. I look forward to comments back and forth and I really believe bloggers are a special kind of people.
2)Blogging gives me the opportunity to safely and openly explore views that are much different than my own and helps me keep an open mind.
3) Blogging helps me feel more connected because there are people who are supportive and feel the same as I do. It’s hard to not feel like “the only one” sometimes but blogging reminds me that’s just not true.
4) Blogging is so much cheaper than therapy. My computer allows me to express my deepest feelings freely and without judgement. Don’t we all want that?
5) Plain and simple, I just love to write and if that’s my worst habit than I believe it’s a good one.
Now it’s YOUR turn. What is the number one reason YOU blog?
I can’t help but think that deep down we all desire to be nurtured. From the time most of us are tiny human beings, we snuggle up close in someone’s arms and feel safe enough to fall asleep. We get so used to being taken care of and loved and one day, if we are fortunate, we have children of our own and do the same. Sometimes, in the midst of excitement over having a child and the busy schedule that comes along when one arrives, we spend so much time nurturing everyone else that we forget to nurture ourselves. We long for the same nurturing we have always craved but somewhere in our act of nurturing, we convince ourselves that if we are the nurturer, we no longer need to be nurtured. This couldn’t be further from the truth. Life is a constant struggle to maintain balance and when it comes to being nurtured or nurturing, there is an important need for balance there too. Be kind to yourself. Talk to yourself with the same kind of love and compassion that you do with everybody else. It’s okay to put others ahead, just don’t leave yourself behind.
I have a decorative candle holder in a spot that I have to notice every day. It says, Slow down, happiness is trying to catch you.
It wasn’t too long ago when I myself was lining up to take part in the rat race. My kids were signed up for too many sports and the activities were taking up every single minute of time we would never get back. I was living my life according to a clock and it pains me to recall how miserable and exhausted I felt. I am proud to say I never did make it to the finish line. I quit one day and right there and then dropped out of the race for good. Our lives have more quality now. Jamming something into every second is not living, at least not for me. I enjoy quiet time and hanging out at home and I finally feel we have reached the perfect balance. Sometimes, it’s in those still moments that you notice the most beautiful sunrise or the magnificence of a glowing star. So this is a reminder to slow down and take in all that is around you. That other stuff was never really important and years from now you will look back and wish you lived a simpler life. Time is like a bomb that is strapped to us just waiting to go off, ticking and ticking until one day, in the blink of an eye, we wake up and wonder where the years have gone. Spend them living, smiling, loving and finding gratitude for all the gifts that are all around you. Do you even notice them anymore or are you just too busy?