How Did I Get It So Wrong?

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If you like my warm, fuzzy inspirational posts, do yourself a favor and stop reading here. For those of you brave enough to read on, I would like to share with you how I would raise my kids differently if I could do it all over. At least what I would teach them anyway. 

I grew up in a little bubble where life was perfect and everyone was wonderful. Seriously, looking back, I know now that I was so naive. I respected and trusted every adult. I expected the best from everyone. I had a great run of my childhood years. It wasn’t until I became a parent myself that I learned some of the most painful and surprising lessons of all. If I could write my younger self a letter I would tell her, a long with my two children this.

Life is unfair. Every single day you will witness something that just doesn’t seem right. People will not speak out. Don’t expect them too. They are weak and scared and care more about how they appear to everyone else than to ever stand against something that is wrong. Never take anyone at their word because it is actions that speak and never the words. Expect the absolute worst from everyone so you are never disappointed when that is what they hand you. No one and I repeat no one will ever have your back. You may think they will, but when it comes down to your back or theirs, they will choose their own every single time. Trust no one. Expect people will let you down and if they don’t, be grateful. Be your own best friend, your own best advocate and always be your own self. The crowd is overrated. Don’t get lost somewhere in the middle of it. You will suffocate, never find your way out. Know too that there is good in this world. There are good acts and good people and a handful of honest ones. You won’t know which is which until it’s far too late. Trust your instincts and rely on the only person who will never let you down, YOU.

I had a rough day. The amount of people who do harm gets to me sometimes, especially when it comes to my kids. When I place them in the hands of someone who could make or break their self esteem and more importantly, their spirit,they seem to destroy them every single time. 

Everything you do affects everyone else. Every word. Every action. Your good mood or bad mood. We are all connected. We have to stop being so damn selfish and heartless. Be better than the crowd. The world needs you to. I need you to.

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17 thoughts on “How Did I Get It So Wrong?

  1. Living in a bubble does not necessarily mean you are that stupid or naïve to think everyone is your best friend and cares. Being hypervigilant as to what surrounds you, who is around you and why? Skeptical but alert, cautious perhaps. Protecting oneself and children from others who may have bad intentions or no intentions at all. Since 9-11 many things have changed us and not all for the better, quite the opposite. My extended family and I are extremely close we like it that way.

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    • Funny you say that because I think one of the worst things about moving away from everyone is your kids don’t have that safety net. The feeling that there is tribe there to fall back on. I was very close to extended family when I was young and maybe that’s why so felt so safe and protected. Unfortunately, now that I have teens, they are out of the house more than they are in it. I can’t protect them from everyone and everything but teaching them to be cautious and aware should help them in the long run. I don’t think some teachers or coaches understand the effect they have on kids who think the world of them. It’s a really tough balance

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Sadly, everything that you said is right. That is the world that we’re living in. But there are those few, few and far between, who are still good, caring and compassionate toward others. We ourselves must set that example for our children, so that if they can find no one else, then at least they will have us.

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  3. I was interested to read your blog and the comments that followed. I agree about the crowd being overrated and about the need to be wary, but not really about the only person who will never let you down being yourself.

    At least, that hasn’t been my experience. I’ve let myself down badly a number of times, and often it has only been through the kindness of others that I’ve managed to get back on my feet again. I’m not rich, handsome or powerful, so there wasn’t really much in it for them other than my friendship.

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