Since I’ve been writing about teachable moments lately, today I learned an important lesson myself. I was talking to a friend with boys about teenage girls and how different it is raising one of each. We laughed about injuries and broken bones when it comes to boys but agreed raising a teenage girl requires a great deal of patience, a sense of humor and then even more patience. It’s so hard to keep up with the moods and the eye rolling. Sometimes it’s a contest between the two of us. Seriously, how old and I 16? I was telling her how girls can twist their face and do something weird with their eyes until they look like a psychotic, angry monster and what do I do back? Shamefully, the same exact thing. I do the very thing I tell my kids they SHOULDN’T do. I am failing my own lessons.
It occurred to me that my behavior is often a reaction to someone’s behavior toward me. If someone nasty to me, shamefully I am nasty back. If someone is usually friendly to me, I’ll make an effort to be friendly too. I don’t always have that block response alarm in my brain that yells Kim, DON’T DO IT, STOP! Sometimes my body language and mouth react so quickly that I don’t even realize what I did until it’s done. I really have to work on keeping my cool and reminding myself to make a solid effort to speak to people the way I want to be spoken to regardless how they speak to me. I need to treat everyone with kindness and respect and stop using my reactions to compete with or punish anyone else. In the long run, the only one really punished is me. No more excuses. No more allowing my ego to pilot my plane. I am in control of everything I say and do and it has nothing to do with anyone else. Today, I have to choose love. I have to do better. My kids are watching.
Straight from vocabulary.com
A hypocrite preaches one thing, and does another.