We are spending our last two days of so called fall “break” doing an extensive research paper on Kilauea volcano. I say we because having a kid with ADD does not provide for hours of dedicated attention span and requiring the paper to be done APA format makes it even longer and more intricate to complete. My daughter is in 11th grade and has never done a paper in this style. It would be nice if there was time in class to work on these papers and to make sure the teachers actually taught and explained what APA format entails. Where do they think the kids learn? The parents of course and here’s a newsflash. We didn’t have computers back then. We didn’t have to figure out how to cite something because there is no author or because it came from a website with no author. Give me a break. We never had to submit our reports electronically or add pictures using a computer that have to be certain dimensions. We could write the report, tape on the darn pictures, carry it to school and physically hand it in. Pardon me if I am technologically behind and I barely know how to turn a computer on. It’s tough times for us parents who are generationally behind. How can we help our kids who can’t seem to help themselves? It really gets under my skin. Really, a break means just that, a break, no work. This has really ruined everyone’s weekend. It just doesn’t seem fair.
I know that we like to have the weekends free, if for nothing else but having that mental break.
However when my children see me working on the weekends (not all the time but it does happen) I tell them, “You do what you have to do if you take pride in yourself and your performance. Not because you have to but because you want to.” So when my children have work over the weekend they know the expectation is to take the time to get it done. Pride can be a good thing is channeled properly.
When it comes to technology, it can be challenging. I am lucky in the sense that, as a former field PC technician, I understand (better than most) the technology that is used today. There are plenty of good resources on ‘youtube’ that can see you thought it and do not doubt the value of a good ‘google’ search.
Now don’t get me wrong, neither of my children are ADD or ADHD but I have plenty of friends that do. I understand the challenges that bring and I empathize with your additional challenges.
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When we do work from3:45-9:30 at night every week night after school, I see no reason or value carrying work into the weekend especially over break. Work is one thing. School is another. Much of this work and these projects are dumped onto the parents. It should at least be something these kids can do on their own. They are doing less and less in school and more and more at home.
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I too work full time, so I understand your frustration when I come home and there is a ton of homework that they need help with. Science fair projects were the big things for years, where a lot of work was brought home.
I am not sure how it is with your schools but as my children progressed through school, tons of work in elementary school. They have just as much in middle and high school, the big difference is that time is built in the day to get it done in school. So if something is brought home it is because they didn’t finish it during class.
Sports have actually helped with my children’s focus. They both have practice almost every day after school, so they know that if they do not get their work done during the day they will have to do it at night. That ends up being a great motivator.
At the end of the day I try not to make it a big deal or a hassle. The reality is that as they get older the work and expectations will rise accordingly, so might as well get them disciplined now and develop good work habits early. It will serve them better later in life.
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If you say so. It’s a little different with a kid who struggles in school. You can’t even compare the two. I know because my older one fits into the category you describe. My younger one does not. All the discipline in the world cannot help a kid complete something he just doesn’t know how to do. It’s not a matter of discipline and work ethic. It’s a matter of having too much work, not enough instruction and not a second to allow the mind to take a break from being overstimulated. There’s a difference. The projects and extra work he does at home has nothing to do with what they are learning in the classroom. It is totally separate. So, he has the usual workload and homework/studying plus this outside project. It’s all self taught. Two of his classes are this way. Biology and science so it’s like double the information and learning content with half the teaching. Does that help understand it a little better? We only judge from what we know but not every school is the same. I’ve moved enough to know π
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Wow! Keeps getting worse doesn’t it? Geez!
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It just really gets me down. I think mostly because he requires so much help. I can only do so much and I do t have much of a support system. I end up getting mad at him and that’s not fair at all. All the parents are frustrated. They have been posting on Facebook about it all day. We’ve been working on this for 5 weeks and still can’t get it done because of all that is required π¦
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π¦

http://www.cnn.com/2014/03/21/health/homework-stress/
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You were sitting in spam again! Thank you for sharing this
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I know. Other people’s comments were in my spam too! Darn it!
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Yeah, what is up with that?
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π
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You are very right. Since when has it become the parents’ homework?
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If it’s all self-taught, why not just let them self-learn? Unschooling is the best gift I have given our family!
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I have been seriously considering it. The drawback is my son likes school. He is such a social soul and I don’t know how that would effect me. It’s killing me though. I can’t do this much longer π¦ I will look into it a little more. It does seem to make more sense.
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I have a page with a few posts I’ve written, lots of good links in them =) I would be more than happy to point you toward more resources or talk with you about it
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Thank you! I ran the idea by my son and he wants to know more about it π I will check out your posts π
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Do you live in a large city? There are soo many social opportunities available!
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I am 30 minutes from one
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We live in a town of 400 currently. My kids choose to go to church twice a week because it affords them the opportunity to socialize with friends (we’re not religious). They go to the library, where they also had a kids program during the summer. They go to community events where they meet people of all ages. They see a fellow homeschooling family once every week or two when we shop at their organic farm market. We met up with another family occasionally after school or on weekends. And this is all just in our tiny town!
The library in most small to large cities usually has clubs, story time, and other activities regularly. There are classes and sports through the city’s parks and recreation department. Most cities have some kind of homeschooling group or even just a mom’s group. And don’t forget local parks, lakes, museums, zoos, etc. It requires a little more effort, but you will soon become familiar with different places and ways to socialize. The beauty is that my kids get the chance to interact with every age of people instead of mostly the same age as them.
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I totally agree! I hate when the schools automatically assume everyone has and can afford internet too!
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