Put Down The Darn Gloves

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I don’t want to fight.

Really, I don’t!

I’m finding communication to be quite challenging lately. Why is it when I have a question for someone, they raise their boxing gloves? As a parent, I feel I have the right to ask questions to anyone who comes in contact with either one of my children. The last time I asked a simple question about the teaching style of a particular class, the teacher attacked me and became very defensive. Why ARE people so defensive

Today, I got a call from the dental hygienist notifying me that Kayleigh missed her appointment. When I asked how she notified us of the appointment, her tone changed and the tackling began. In a very snotty tone she assured me that the reminder came to “this number”(my cellphone) and that someone confirmed the appointment. The truth is the text went to my husbands phone when I told the office a few months ago to make sure all appointment reminders come to me and only me.  As she was searching for an available time to reschedule the cleaning I decided to tell her about Chases teeth. He got his braces off two weeks ago and I was sick inside when he smiled at me for the first time. All I could see were two silver fillings in his top, front, two teeth. When I told her this, she went straight to irate telling me this could not have happened in that office because they wouldn’t put silver fillings in the front of someone’s mouth. She went on and on and on.  Was she insinuating that I was lying or that we went somewhere else to have work done and we were trying to pin it on their office? Shouldn’t she maybe have looked at his chart before lecturing me? I seriously couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Why does everything come down to confrontation? I just don’t get it. She was supposed to speak with the dentist and call me back but that was several hours ago. I’m almost to the point where I don’t want to interact with anyone. I can’t take anymore of it and I don’t want to be a whipping board for someone’s misplaced anger or insecurity.

I’m not sharing this to complain. I am hoping it will bring awareness to the way you speak to other people. Are you always ready for a fight? Do YOU feel attacked? Do you often take things personally more times than not? Is this only happening to me? 

Take a breath. Calm down and know everything can’t possibly be all about you. You’re just not that important. None of us are. Sometimes a question is simply a question.

33 thoughts on “Put Down The Darn Gloves

  1. The silver fillings matter bugs me. First, how are you unaware of what is being done to your son’s teeth before it happens? How can he have fillings put in BEHIND braces? Second, yea, that office is whackadoodle and a bit immature.

    Take a breath, Mrs. Heck. 🙂 Think about your yoga. It might just be a mad season in the stars for you. [Though everything I glanced at about Taurus in the astrology posts said something about dreams coming true.]

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I agree life would be much more pleasant if people took a breath and thought before becoming confrontational. On of my first parent/teacher meeting as a new teacher I had a very aggressive parent tell me how bad their sons behaviour had been since starting my class. I would normally be defensive but for once I took a breath a said what are we doing wrong that is effecting your son. She completely change and said it wasn’t the school it was his age, problems at home etc. It really taught me not to default to confrontation mode.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. O.K. I am thinking you and writingbolt are good friends otherwise you would have exploded by now instead of getting defensive. Very funny repartee’. You two should do a comedy act. I am one of those darn defensive people but I’m working on it. I’m always working on something.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. It really is ridiculous now. Especially when it comes from someone in the customer service industry. As a customer/client/consumer we aren’t treated with the same respect we used to be. There’s this attitude that “if you don’t like it, you can go somewhere else,” which is exactly what I might tell that receptionist… Or her boss, if it comes to it. That attitude is unacceptable. Even as a kid, I was the first person to get shitty right back with a customer IF they did it to me…but not for a politely stated question or concern…

    Liked by 2 people

  5. So I went on the offensive today with Verizon Wireless. Trying to do a chat and the woman didn’t seem to even know what an Iphone is. She kept talking in circles and trying to fake that she understood that I was trying to apply a credit. Eventually, she made it around to where she started so I told her I would call customer service. I really like Chats because I don’t have to actually talk to someone. Anyway, when that little satisfaction survey popped up, I told them that their claim that I was guaranteed to get good customer service was false. As I was punching in the customer service number on the phone, I said, “Whoa, wasn’t this what inspire was posting about. Only, I am the aggressive one.” So, I was so nice and cooperative with the customer service woman on the phone. Me: “Oh sure, no problem, just take your time. I really appreciate your help. I just know we got that e-mail but I must have accidentally deleted it so I am sure it’s my fault.” Yuk! LOL But it made me feel better about giving the chat lady a ration of shit. Thanks for the reminder that “there is no need to get huffy”.😏

    Liked by 1 person

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