So often we feel like we are stuck in a rut. We focus on how awful it feels to be in this place of stagnation and slowly but surely we start to feel helpless and even worse, hopeless. We don’t mean to have a pity party for ourselves in that dark little place but in a weird way, it gives a sense of comfort that does nothing but super glue us in a place we never wanted to be in the first place.
It’s true, there is so much around us we cannot change. Sometimes it’s just not possible to change jobs or escape dealing with some of the difficult people around us. So we sit and sit until we start to believe that is our only chair.
Recently I’ve started asking myself a simple question that has led to small, subtle changes. What can I do? What can I do to help myself get out of this mess? What CAN I do to enhance my interactions with the people I’d rather not be around?
When you switch your focus from I can’t seem to do anything to help myself to what I actually can do to help myself, one very important thing changes…your attitude. Just coming back into the light of hope can make all the difference. When you actually feel like you have a plan, anything seems possible. Next time you are feeling stuck, don’t focus on what you can’t do, focus on what you can.
“Hope is like a road in the country; there was never a road, but when many people walk on it, the road comes into existence.” -Lin Yutang
When I was a kid, I loved the weekends. We would sleep in and mom or dad would make pancakes or eggs. We would sit at the table and hang out while catching up after the busyness of the week. There were no cell phones or laptops. Heck, there wasn’t even internet in my town until I was much older and still we never had a computer in the house.
Now a days, weekends are filled with laptops on every table. My husband spends hours catching up on work and email and my daughter fills in answer after answer on physics packets in between writing papers for AP Language Arts. My sons weekends are filled with studying, searching for answers on study guides and five weeklong projects and a new theme paper every single week.
What in the world is happening to our lives? Does no one have respect for anyone’s time anymore? People need a break, a pause in the unfortunate normalcy of the nonstop week. Will kids be smarter and better because we jam work down their throats on weekends too? Will the small profit to a company be a trade for stress, depression, high blood pressure and obesity from countless hours at a table typing letters on a device that robs us of moments of our precious lives?
Weekends should be a time to rest. Recuperation is necessary both physically and mentally. How can we perform at our best level if we are expected to be on 24/7. I think it’s a shame. Our time to talk, to love and bond are being replaced by ridiculous science projects that don’t do anything but frustrate the hell out of everyone. Chatting with our teens has been replaced by sitting near them while they try and finish up their work. And relationships? We have become threesomes- 2 people and a technological device.
Shame on schools and corporations and shame on people like me who allow it to happen. At the end of our life, we will be dead. We cannot take our work ethic, our job, our degree or our money with us when we go. Think about that when you decide how to spend the few hours you have this weekend. Make them count! Be the change you wish to see in the world. Make a stand. Say no.m
Need a reason to smile? It’s Friday. You made it through another week and you have the opportunity to live another day. Find something to be grateful for and let that feeling fill you up. Smile a little brighter, be a little kinder and go out there and be awesome today! We could all use a little more awesome in the world. Why not start a movement? Be a leader.
Angels come in many forms. Tonight in a very short notice, I found a sweet girl to come over and help Chase in math. A little help goes a long, long way and tonight I will sleep better because of her. If you can help someone out, do it! It is the little things that seem so insignificant that make the biggest difference to someone on the receiving end. Be a blessing any way you can.
Hope never abandons you, you abandon it.” -George Weinberg
My husband was glued to the news while I was trying to go to sleep last night so I had no choice but to listen in. All the hype was over Trump not participating in the debate tonight and how that would “hurt” the American people by not offering them an opportunity to hear another ridiculous question/answer saga. They also tried to make the case that if he became president, he would have to go up against people who didn’t treat him kindly. Regardless of how I feel about Trump, I will say this. I love to see people make a stand. It excites me when someone has the courage to follow their own instinct instead of being manipulated by the people around them. It gives me hope that there are a handful still left that will make a stand even if it means being ridiculed and having to stand alone. Kudos to him for showing he calls his own shots. Don’t we all wish we had the courage to do that?
They say insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result.
I have another meeting at the school today to discuss new accommodations for Chase. They aren’t really new ideas but rather worded in a new way they hope will be more specific for teachers to understand. This is their sneaky way of getting away with doing nothing. If we continue to talk about ways to change the 504, we never then have to focus on how to enforce it. Usually on days where I have to sit down with the same administers that have caused me nothing but grief, I have an increased amount of anxiety and border on melting down into a full blown panic attack. Today is different. I have a new calm and a new confidence and they can no longer shake me. The meeting is pointless. The world will not be fixed in one day and certainly their word will not mean a thing overnight either. Like it or not, people are predictable and often they repeat the same patterns over and over. They are not really willing to change but always eager to talk a good talk. Today I am going to listen without interest and without any hope for change. It’s like that trip to the dentist every six months that you aren’t psyched about but cannot avoid. You just go sit in the chair, stare at the light and hope the time passes quickly so you can get up and leave. That is my approach today. I will not get worked up or upset by people who do not mean a thing. These people have shown their true colors and are never going to change despite the millions of times we set aside to meet. Wish me luck as I allow my thoughts to fade into the light. They will no longer tell me who I am in there. I am strong, I am confident and I am a mom who would do anything to make sure her child gets what he needs. I know now that so don’t need their help to make that happen. I can do it all on my own.
For every problem, there has got to be a solution. Everything has an opposite. I keep reminding myself of this on a daily basis. My insomnia has been unbearable lately but I have learned to put it to good use. I keep repeating this over and over until it starts to sink in. Every problem has a solution.
It’s so easy to get caught up overly obsessing about the problems we have. I thought though, what if I flip it around and focus only on solutions? At least that direction of thinking will lead me to someplace empowering and hopeful. I am going to replace each problem with a solution until I reach the point of no return. So that is my message today. There is hope. There is a solution.