Double standards make me crazy. How in the world is it possible to expect more from everyone else than we do ourselves?
I was in Target the other day walking out behind a young mother and her 2 year old son. She had just given him a lollipop and kept repeating over and over, “say thank you!” The boy continued to suck on his pop and and when he ignored her request, she smacked him pretty hard on the backside. So, you want your child to be courteous and polite yet when he doesn’t do what you want him to do, you spank him? Imagine what happens next time that child wants a drink and that mother doesn’t get it for him. Will he hit her the way she hit him? Who knows.
We have to model for our children who we want them to become. The hard part is not acting out of anger in a way we never want our kids to do. This just happened to me the other day. My son had a take home test in Spanish. All the kids had failed yet another test in another class and guess who was left to pick up the pieces? I lost it! I was horrible and I am still angry with myself and my choice of words. I wasn’t really angry at him but he took the brunt of it. I was angry that there was another class I now had to become the teacher for. I try to teach him to be understanding and patient and then he watches as I completely freak out on him because he cannot answer the questions on a silly exam. I can’t even imagine how that made him feel about himself. He is already struggling and I make him feel even more guilty than he already does.
It’s tough to be a decent human being through every thought and every mood. How we act when things are not going our way tells a great deal about us. It is in those difficult moments that we discover how human we really are. The fact is that there is no excuse for bad behavior. When you know right from wrong, it’s necessary to hold yourself to a higher standard. Treat people with compassion and respect. They are not your whipping board or a sponge to soak up your frustration. They are people with feelings too and they deserve your respect. I guess today I will try again and hope I do better than yesterday. Admitting a problem is the first step in fixing it. What are you willing to admit today?