Can Goals Become Too Important?


Everywhere I look, people are trying to do more, be more. I can’t help but sit back and wonder to myself, are goals starting to be more important than living these days? Conversations with friends revolve around the desperate need for their kids to get straight A’s. Guess what? Not everyone is capable of getting an A in every class. What kind of message are we starting to scream to our children? Anything less than perfect is not good enough? I watch as parents spend almost 1000 dollars to help their college bound student get a better grade on the ACT test. Do we really need our kids to get into Harvard or Yale to feel like they are successful? When is enough enough? How many parents rave about their kids getting a 4.0 at the end of their college years when in the real world what matters is if they get a job and how well they do it? How many teams do we have to encourage our son to play on to do everything we can to eliminate his chance of sitting on the high school bench? How many hours do we have to spend grasping at goals that don’t mean a damn thing in the end? Is perfection and being the best worth the time we trade for it every single day? Does happiness and living have to be dependent on whether or not we ever reach our goals and do you ever ask yourself, what is the cost? 

I’m sorry but I will not raise my children to kill themselves to be above the crowd. I will raise them to appreciate their real gifts and encourage them to use those gifts to better the world. I will encourage them to appreciate time and the things that most agree are really important at the end of our lives. I will encourage them to be their own personal best and not to compare themselves to the people around them. I will show them that I love them for who they are and never make them feel it is conditional on how well they do. Not being the best but rather their personal best, will always be good enough for me. 


9 thoughts on “Can Goals Become Too Important?

  1. Some retailers reward their children customers for straight A report card. What about the kids who struggle to get C’s and that is the best they can do? Or even B students who have worked hard to get there? I was criticized for not rewarding my customers for grades and I wanted to say, “That is your responsibility, not mine.” but I just stated my case and left it at that.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. socialworkerangela

    I agree with everything you said. I have one son who skipped a grade and another with an iep. They both are smart in their own way. No need to be perfect.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. My girls are completely different, one gets A’s easily while the other struggles to get B’s and sometimes C’s, but she also works very at her part time job, is Captain of her Junior Roller Derby Team and has the hugest heart. Getting straight A’s is definitely not the be all to end all.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Just Plain Ol' Vic

    I hope I have learned from my parents (what they did not do right with me), so I try to focus my kids on what is important. I focus on their effort and I appreciate the results (whatever they are) as long as they tried their best. I also want them to enjoy what they do, so I am careful not to apply too much pressure to make things seem like “work.”

    Liked by 1 person

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