“How am I supposed to get to them underneath all of this?”
That was my sons response when I called him downstairs at almost 10:00 at night to get his freshly washed sheets from underneath 4 loads of wash that still needed to be folded so he could put them back on his bed and go to sleep.
As he said those words, the truth became inescapably clear. How in the world could I get to anything I needed to get done when so many things kept piling up on top of the list I couldn’t even find anymore? No wonder I’ve been feeling so unmotivated!
Why do I let that happen? Sometimes I get so overwhelmed that I just ignore it all. I avoid those mundane, unappreciated, everyday, annoying tasks that act as a super efficient time suck. One small load of laundry turns into a mountain high pile of clothes that becomes so intimidating I don’t even know where to start. I shut the door and walk away. Everyday I feel smaller as I am crushed underneath everything until there is not enough air in the room to even breathe. I got several texts today. “Mom, I’m out of cereal and I need shampoo.” “Mom can you pick up sharpies so I can finish my blackout poem? Oh and colored duck tape for my science project and some chili cheese tator tots when you pick me up after school?”
As hard as it is to admit, I’m not twenty years old anymore. My energy supply is limited and when my tank is empty there’s nothing more I can do. I have found peace with going to bed with a list of things that didn’t get done. It doesn’t matter how much I do today, tomorrow there will always be more and that’s something I have to learn to live with.