Breaking News!

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I’m not one for making excuses for people, really I’m not. I think it’s important each and everyone of us takes responsibility for our lives including our words and actions. On the other hand, I have learned first hand that the story line that starts out as truth can easily be tweaked and edited to fit the readers agenda. The reader can then retell the story changing the most important part, the truth. I read something on Facebook today. It went something like this. 

Don’t judge others.

               You’re not perfect!

The words just jumped off the page and grabbed me by the head and shook it violently until I acknowledged the truth. How do I or anyone else for that matter, believe we are in any position to judge anyone else? The truth gets lost somewhere in gossiping the details. Remember when we were kids and we played the game telephone? We all repeated the same thing right, exactly what we heard. Only the end result was much different than the starting remark. Don’t fall victim to nonsense. I’ve seen my own story be rewritten to twist my heroism until I looked like the villain. People get it wrong because some people purposely tell the story wrong. Use your own mind. Do your own research and ask yourself, does this even make any sense? Come on people, you have to be smarter than the latest headline.

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Empty Promises

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Commitments are so hard to keep these days. I start out with the best of intentions but my laziness and defeating self talk often stand in the way of any completion. 44 days ago I made the decision to focus less on my weight and more on becoming stronger and fitter. I took a 15 day challenge followed by a 30 day challenge and tomorrow will be 45 days of creating a stronger, better, more confident me. The more I commit to my own goals, the better I feel about myself every day. I started at a low point. I was in pain, had little motivation and believed I would never see the results I wanted to achieve. Tomorrow one challenge ends and the next one begins. My new mindset is to stop focusing on the end result. Stop comparing who I am today to who I want to be. Change occurs slowly and takes dedication and devotion every single day. Before you know it, one day turns into one week and one week into one month. My new motto is strong and steady. I will get there and every day I am one step closer. One day at a time I am learning discipline. I am retraining my brain to speak a new language. You can do this. You are strong. You are doing this. Keep on going. It really is mind over matter but it doesn’t happen over night. Sometimes you have to be your own life coach because after all, no one is more affected by your own choices than you are. Use affirmations and encouraging words and when you finally do picture yourself at the finish line, you will be there smiling.

Please Tell Me This is Just a Horrible Dream

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I am starting to feel ill watching the darkness that has settled over my country during this election process. I am amazed at how we will lay down our life and our own relationships to defend a candidate that we believe we know everything about yet we have never even met. How could we choose a stranger over our own flesh and blood or destroy friendships that have survived for years over the choice of a candidate or differences in opinion when it comes to politics? Times have shown that we value our opinions and political affiliation over the people in our lives. I find it sad and disturbing but who am I? We have become a people who love to tell others they are wrong. We have become internet bullies waiting and lurking to use our freedom of speech to degrade someone or tell them their opinions are wrong. Who do we think we are that we assume we know more than somebody else? And what kind of monsters have we become that we will fight til the death to get in the last chide comment or nasty, know-it-all word?

Frankly, I have had enough. I never thought I would live in a time where we go out of our way to say an unkind word and tear others down. I never dreamed I would live in an era of dissension, disrespect, and verbal war. I never thought I would see people grow so big that they are bursting out of their own skin. Please tell me this is just a horrible dream. I can’t seem to wake myself up.

Why Are We So Out of Control?

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I can’t help wonder why so many people are out of control. I spent a week at the beach and the acting out I witnessed actually took me by surprise. It seems there is a population of ticking time bombs always on the verge of exploding all over anyone that slightly inconveniences them. It’s scary how instantaneously people react these days with little or no regard for the turmoil they leave in the path behind them. It’s not only disheartening but embarrassing to watch. Slowly and surely, many of us are losing self control. Whether it’s eating, lashing out or whatever else, we no longer limit what we should. We don’t think before we speak, we don’t consider the tone of the voice we are directing at a fellow human being and we have no remorse over the hurtful and critical things that come out of our mouths. 

I say be better! Be bigger than the smallness attacking us from every angle. Be an example in a world full of lost souls. Be a soft voice among the loud, angry tone. Be sympathetic in a world filled with blame. Be complimentary among the criticism and most importantly, be kind in a world that has become self absorbed. It only takes one person at a time to make a slow and steady difference. I hope you will join me.

I Choose Love

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As I leave each mile marker behind me, I am reminded of the people I am leaving behind. I always love a visit home but every mile I travel away, is a little more my heart starts to ache. I’ve lived away for many years but returning twice a year has always been a priority that I hope I have instilled in my own kids. I have taught them family first. I remember when I first landed 15 days ago. I was in awe at the beautiful shades of green and the mountains on all sides of me. When I lived here many years ago, I think I stopped noticing how beautiful this place was that I had the fortune of growing up in. Now that I live in Oklahoma and the world is flat and the trees are low, I miss the beautiful state of New Jersey more than ever. I wonder if the same thing happens with family as well. I think when you grow up your entire life with family around you, you start to take them for granted. You stop realizing the importance of the people who can be there in a moments notice. It happens very slowly at first until the people we claim to love become a nuisance and annoyance to us. We stop noticing how beautiful family really is. Not to me. It hurts to watch it happening when I want so much to have someone in arms reach when the rest of the world seems scary and my loneliness becomes the only friend I have. It hurts when you make people a priority and my heart breaks when that same enthusiasm is not returned. It hurts to love people. It hurts to watch people wrapped up in things that just don’t matter. 

Today, as I ride on this bus I am grateful that I have a place to call home. I am grateful for the little moments that I bottle in my heart until I can return. I close my eyes and I see the sweet smile on my nephews face and hear the silly giggle of my sister in law and the joy on my brothers face as he watches his baby boy. As I think of the tears in my mothers eyes as she pulled away, my own cheeks feel the sting of tears. It’s hard loving people and it’s hard letting them go to get on to more of the silly stuff that doesn’t matter. You either get it or you don’t. You love or you don’t. You make family a priority or you don’t. You always have a choice. I choose love.

I Choose Love

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As I leave each mile marker behind me, I am reminded of the people I am leaving behind. I always love a visit home but every mile I travel away, is a little more my heart starts to ache. I’ve lived away for many years but returning twice a year has always been a priority that I hope I have instilled in my own kids. I have taught them family first. I remember when I first landed 15 days ago. I was in awe at the beautiful shades of green and the mountains on all sides of me. When I lived here many years ago, I think I stopped noticing how beautiful this place was that I had the fortune of growing up in. Now that I live in Oklahoma and the world is flat and the trees are low, I miss the beautiful state of New Jersey more than ever. I wonder if the same thing happens with family as well. I think when you grow up your entire life with family around you, you start to take them for granted. You stop realizing the importance of the people who can be there in a moments notice. It happens very slowly at first until the people we claim to love become a nuisance and annoyance to us. We stop noticing how beautiful family really is. Not to me. It hurts to watch it happening when I want so much to have someone in arms reach when the rest of the world seems scary and my loneliness becomes the only friend I have. It hurts when you make people a priority and my heart breaks when that same enthusiasm is not returned. It hurts to love people. It hurts to watch people wrapped up in things that just don’t matter. 

Today, as I ride on this bus I am grateful that I have a place to call home. I am grateful for the little moments that I bottle in my heart until I can return. I close my eyes and I see the sweet smile on my nephews face and hear the silly giggle of my sister in law and the joy on my brothers face as he watches his baby boy. As I think of the tears in my mothers eyes as she pulled away, my own cheeks feel the sting of tears. It’s hard loving people and it’s hard letting them go to get on to more of the silly stuff that doesn’t matter. You either get it or you don’t. You love or you don’t. You make family a priority or you don’t. You always have a choice. I choose love.