One of the toughest challenges I’ve had as a parent is not falling into the trap of pushing my kids to do it all. When you say yes to everything and anything kids think they want to do, life can quickly spiral out of control. I have one kid who likes to participate in everything and one who doesn’t seem to be part of anything. Both are equally frustrating. The one who is overly excited to do it all has probably been more of a challenge. I really believe encouraging her to do it all and push herself to exhaustion is negligent on my part. Instead I’ve made her make some difficult choices because the older I get, the more I realize how important balance really is. We’ve had the conversation, I get you want to play volleyball and swim but I’m sorry you will have to choose. To those parents who take pity on themselves for their never ending schedule of ridiculous things to do, I say shame on you. Life is about making choices, hard choices and knowing limitations is a skill that will always come in handy. If you are yessing your kids to death at your own expense both financially and physically, at what point to do you look yourself in the mirror and ask, “what am I trying to prove?” How can parents go night after night until the time kids go to bed running from one activity to another not for just one but sometimes three and four kids. They don’t play one sport anymore they play three. Or they play one sport but on two or three teams. When do these kids actually get to rest and take a break? Often parents use the excuse that their kids get bored when they have a night at home with nothing to do. Try playing a game or going on a family walk or encouraging one to relax and breathe. We are under this silly notion that our day should be jam packed with endless places to go and things to do. Newsflash, that is not living at all. Nothing is really okay sometimes, quiet can be really good. Who can live in the moment when you are rushing to get from one to the next? Bottom line is there comes a time when you need to accept that more is sometimes too damn much and sometimes less really is more. Teach balance and discipline and how to make choices. Maybe that should be a subject in school these days because we seem to be failing our children at home when it comes to these lessons. Do what you love and love what you do but find a healthy balance. Rant over.
2 thoughts on “When More Is Too Much”
You are absolutely right and I wonder how many parents do this shit not for their kids but for the selfish egotistical need to look like they’re always busy to other parents. It’s the whole “I’m better than you because I’m busier” and it’s total nonsense. We are human beings, not human doings, as someone once pointed out.
I love that saying. Good thing to remember!