A kind gesture can reach a wound that only compassion can heal~~Steve Maraboli
When someone is having a rough time, find a way to understand.
When someone trusts you enough to vent, listen, don’t judge.
When someone is feeling stressed, offer your calm, not your opinions.
When someone is sinking in despair, offer words of hope.
When someone is down, don’t kick them again, lend a hand and help them up.
When someone feels the world is out to get them, be the one has their back.
Kindness and compassion can make such a difference in someone’s life. Be the difference they need today.
I remember the first time I started listening to Wayne Dyer and I heard the question about squeezing the orange. The question was simple. When you squeeze an orange, what do you get out of it? Silly I thought. Everyone knows the answer is orange juice. Only it wasn’t that simple at all. Often I have asked myself this same question. Kim, if I give you a squeeze what will come out? I shudder to think of the answer. The truth hurts sometimes but is necessary to keep in tune with what is going on in the inside. I know all too well when it’s ugly in there because no matter what I do to make myself look good, when I look in the mirror the outside looks ugly too. Add that to the negativity coming at me from every direction and what I end up with ain’t that pretty. My reflection in the mirror is directly connected to how I fell on the inside. I can say people make me this way or that but the truth is you cant get apple juice from a banana. I know I can’t blame anyone else for is what is already eating me away on the inside. I know I am sour but the question is, how can change the contents? How can I dump this crap out and start all over so who I really am can live inside again?
Today, I challenge you to answer this? If I gave you a squeeze, what would come out?
Do you have the courage to be who you say you are? It’s so easy to point out someone who is acting like a hypocrite. It’s becoming almost second nature to point a finger at someone and force them to be accountable. The question is, do we hold ourselves to that same serious standard? Do we walk around preaching like we are one way and behind closed doors act like someone else?
I know I’m my own life, I have this clear vision of who I want to be. I try every day to get to that destination where the expectation of myself becomes one with the reality of who I am. I do not pretend to be perfect or have all the answers but I do know who and what I have to be to do my part.
The bottom line is simple. I cannot continue to blog about being a decent human being if I am not going to make the necessary changes to become one myself. I have to stop making excuses for bad behavior and say no more while at the same time actively replacing them with different, healthier ones. Let’s stop calling everyone else out and work on improving ourselves. We won’t have time to fact check our Facebook friends and neighbors if we are occupied with fact checking ourselves. It’s time for a change but the question you have to ask yourself is will you be the change or one of the same? Notice how many times you speak or think about someone else doing something you don’t like. Pay attention how preoccupied you are with having opinions about everyone else when you you should be focused on the work you need to do on yourself. Imagine if you spent as much time building others up and pointing out their strengths how natural that would become when applying it to yourself. Let’s make an effort to practice using our positive voice and create the change we so desperately need to see in this world. We the people need to be better people. Are you with me?
I was blessed enough to attend a yoga workshop with Jen Pastiloff yesterday. She provided the group with many prompts but one really stood out for me. We were directed to make a list of our very best bullshit stories. These are the stories we tell ourselves that keep us disappointed, hopeless and stuck in the one place we don’t want to be, right here. As I started to get really honest with myself, I couldn’t deny I had been convincing myself of so many things that just weren’t true. The problem is, the more I repeat these lame excuses to myself, the more apt I am to give myself a pass which enables me to not even try to change a single corcumstance in my life.
Tell me your biggest bullshit story. Share it so the whole world can hold you accountable and so we can find the courage to not let these ridiculous bs stories control our lives anymore.
Here’s one of mine. I’ve been away from nursing too long to ever go back. It’s too late. Come on call me out.
If you tell a big enough lie and tell it frequently enough, it will be believed.
I’m starting to believe that as sad is this seems, it actually may be very true. The line between truth and lies is blurred now than ever before. We are standing at a crossroad where we can look through the smoke and mirrors and start to think with our own heads. We are only deceived if we allow ourselves to be but like it or not the truth will eventually show itself. Should we accept corruption and deception or put our foot down and declare enough is enough? Honesty is something that used to be respected and valued but these days it’s harder and harder to recognize for sure. Listen to your instincts. Let that be your compass and know that your eyes and ears are the most unreliable guide. What an amazing important time in history. I’m not so confident we are up for the test. The world is watching to see what we will do. Well America, what’s it going to be?
If there’s one question I’ve asked over and over lately it’s this one,
Are you there God?
My vision has been off the last couple of months. Where there was once light, there is now a darkness looming, casting a shadow over every thought and poisoning my mood. All that is left is a sense of dread and hopelessness as I watch the news roll out stories of moral destruction. My heart breaks as I watch people rip each other apart and try and destroy fellow human beings right down to their core.
My mom is in town for a visit and she mentioned to me about Revive Us 2016. It was a one night, live event playing in theatres meant to bring people together and lift them up. I was surprised when we walked inside and saw how full the theatre was. As I listened to the speakers, for the first time in as long as I can remember, I felt something nudge me deep inside. A place that had fallen asleep was passionately waking up. I felt a sense of connection with the others in that room that is hard to explain. We were a group of people with the same concerns and worries looking for some peace and hope. After the event was over, we formed a circle around the theatre and we joined hands in prayer. There was a young girl next to me who was sobbing and I could feel her pain. We all want to feel like we belong. We need to believe that there are others out there just like us longing for a sense of connection and a better way to coexist. We need to feel that sense of tribe that has somehow slipped away when we weren’t looking. I cannot put into words what happened in there tonight but my heart is full. Tonight, I am at peace. As I sat and listened to the various speakers, my heart slowly opened itself back up. God was there in that room, part of our circle, spreading His energy through the hands of the people. The message tonight was clear,
It does not have to be well with our circumstances to be right with our soul.
In these confusing times, we have to follow our own instincts and do what feels right. We have to have the courage to stand up for what we believe. There is no need to explain ourselves or to be ashamed of who we are. I will not judge you and you will not judge me but together we will shine and spread our light. We have to find a way to come together. We have to bring back respect, compassion, truth and love and discard the things that tear us apart.
I’ve ducked out for a little while, hiding underneath my blanket while the world spins further out of control. It hurts to watch it happen on every level. The complacency, corruption, manipulation, dishonesty, and lack of accountability are all around me. I want to shut it out but it knocks on my front door and although I choose not to answer, it just won’t seem to go away. Sometimes I feel like the responsible adult in a world full of incapable, incompetent, selfish children. Being the adult sucks the fun out of living sometimes. Being responsible and accountable and concerned stifles the wind beneath my wings. Slowly and steadily I start to fall until I reach that place of almost impossible to return. Taking care of everything wears me out and I mean that in a literal sense. The me fades away and all that is left is this robotic clone who has mastered perfection in going through the motions. I am there under the mask, close to numb, quietly breaking apart inside my shell.
We are all connected and sometimes the cross we have to carry for those who are unwilling or unable to do their share is impossible to bear. What choice do we have but to pick up the slack, hold our head high and keep inching forward. Sometimes I lose sight of my own purpose because I am so intertwined in the lives of people around me. Sometimes I put me on hold while everyone else goes full steam ahead. Sometimes I forget that I cannot do it all and need to find a way to forgive myself for the person I become when I am drowning in responsibility and the depression starts to work itself through my veins. Sometimes I need to escape the weight of the world that holds me back. Sometimes I just need a moment to breathe. Sometimes I just need to feel like the me I was years ago before I became the me I am today. Sometimes I need to say, hello it’s me until I remember again.