How Did I Miss It?

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One thing I’ve decided to leave behind in 2016 is my medication for depression. I’ve wondered how different I might feel and day by day those feelings are becoming my new reality. As I sat and had lunch with my daughter today I let the pain tug at my heart. Every day that passes by is one less day she will be here with me. College is coming fast and I only have a few months left to get used to the idea of watching her go. She looked different to me today. So grown up, sitting there poised and confident as she dropped a little salsa into her lap. I’ve spent years trying to shape and mold her and she turned out nothing like I had planned. She is her own, unique, obstinate, beautiful version of herself…so much better than I ever imagined. She is smart and funny and kind and there is no doubt she will handle the world with grace all on her own. I am reminded of a quote I read someplace by Wayne Dyer:

When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.

Maybe the person I saw in her today has been there all along. Maybe I just looked at her through different eyes, not critical ones but rather eyes of a mother who has suddenly noticed her baby girl is all grown up. Every day is a new adventure. A new chance to notice something you might have missed the day before.

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4 thoughts on “How Did I Miss It?

    • Thanks you❤️️ I had no idea how difficult parenting would be. The connection between a mother and a child cannot be defined by words. The relationship changes so much through each and every stage but it never gets easier. It hurts to love someone so intensely but it is also amazing and wonderful and there is always something new to learn. Enjoy every second. The time goes by so quickly. Embrace every day and every stage. Take lots is pictures. I promise you will want to look back often while you try and keep up with how fast they grow up. Thanks so much for your comment❤️

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