Finding Calm in All The Chaos


One of the hardest, most painful lessons I have ever been forced to learn is that I do not have control. Ever. I have kicked and screamed and begged and pleaded and still God has not granted me the ability to control a single thing. Not a situation, not a person, nothing. Most things are not in my hands. Life will not go a direction that coddles me softly as I sit in my make believe comfort zone. In fact, I realize that the comfort zone was never even possible. My comfort depends on very specific factors. The fact that everything is constantly changing rips the reality of that zone out from underneath me. Acceptance was the first step. After spending countless precious moments fighting against what was and fighting for something that was just never going to be, I have found a place of calm. Initially, it feels like a place of anxiety and panic but I remind myself as I slow down my breathing that everything will be okay. I have to consciously make the choice to be okay with whatever is, each and everyday. No amount of freaking out on my part will undo my daughters speeding ticket. No amount of screaming and panic will take away the fact that my son got a horrible grade. We just have to live with the things we don’t like that we cannot change. We have to learn to live in that zone that feels uncomfortable like it or not. I say this in several posts as I repeat these words to myself even now. The sky is not falling. I am okay. Life will go on and tomorrow will look like a completely different day. One problem at a time, one fear at a time, one moment at a time. Stop telling yourself it’s the end of the world.

6 thoughts on “Finding Calm in All The Chaos

  1. the-reluctant-parent

    I love this post and you are so right. You posted a long time ago, a similar post and the phrase “that place of calm” jumped out at me as a good title for an extended piece of music. If you’d like to hear it, let me know and I’ll send you a copy. It’s not released yet because I don’t have artwork.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Sometimes when I feel all I want to do is scream or cry, I stop myself to ask ‘Will it make things better?’ ‘Will the problem go away?’ ‘Will it solve anything?’
    Bearing in mind I am an ugly, noisy and snotty cryer, I tend to save face and just deal with it!

    Liked by 1 person

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