So I’m not exactly Sally Sunshine today. If there is one thing in the world I will never understand, it’s lying. To me, that is something that is not only inexcusable but also unforgivable. When you lie to me I am done, simple as that. When you break the trust I have for you, your words mean nothing. The only thing worse than a liar is someone who tries to make you feel bad for not being more supportive and trusting toward them when they know darn right well they have been trying to pull one over on you for quite some time. Do people seriously think they won’t get caught or do they just not care one iota about the relationship in the first place? It takes a special kind of person to be a repetitive liar and I am ashamed I have to be in the same circles with them. Yes I am judging because I value people and trust and honesty and if someone cannot respect those three standards then they do not belong in my life. It’s harsh but who wants any part of a relationship that will always be tainted? When you give an inch to a liar you end up with yardstick lies. It’s makes me sad. How do you deal with people who repeatedly lie?
Something I’ve decided to get serious about lately is reteaching people how to treat me. I have to be consistent and selective when it comes to what I will accept in my relationships these days. I am constantly working on myself but the missing link was working on the interactions within my relationships as well. So what message am I trying to send? My time is important. I am important and I hope I reciprocate the same. We are too distracted and our lack of attentiveness can really make the person on the receiving end feel isolated and unimportant. We can also be pretty flat and sometimes someone needs a little bit of our enthusiasm to make them feel special and loved. So ask yourself, how do people treat me and what am I doing to encourage or discourage their behavior? How do I make others feel and am I being mindful in my interactions? There is always room for growth so why not give it a try?
In a world full of critics, the bravest and most admirable role you could ever play is yourself. When you can be you without reservation or apology, when you can put all of yourself out there in way that leaves you transparent and vulnerable, you have accomplished a freedom that so many long for but will never experience. Courage comes in many forms and there is no greater beauty than seeing someone shine in their own natural light. Don’t ever let anyone tell you who you are. Their labels, opinions and limits can never define you. Only you have the power to do that. Build yourself up in a world that freely participates in tearing one another down. You are amazing for who you are and that isn’t dependent on anything else. Shine today and spread that light deep and far. You matter.
One of the greatest indicators of our own spiritual maturity is revealed in how we respond to the weaknesses, the inexperience, and the potentially offensive actions of others.
David A. Bednar
Those aha moments aren’t always positive ones. I was thinking about how uncomfortable it feels the days I pick my son up from school when he is in a bad mood. Teenagers are just moody and I never know which version of him I’m gonna get. I asked myself the difficult question of what am I like to come home to? It is easy to focus on everyone else but sometimes it’s both painful and necessary to analyze myself. The truth was not pretty but there was no denying it. I wait to bombard my husband with complaints about the things that went wrong with my day before he even closes the door behind him. Honestly, I’m surprised he even comes home at all. Here he is, happy to head home to a peaceful place after a hard day’s work and there I am waiting to pounce. I’m not sure I’d like to come home to me either and I am going to try my best to focus on his day and keep quiet about mine. Sometimes we are too big for our own britches and we fail to see the selfishness that is spilling out of ourselves. So today, I challenge you to ask yourself this simple question. Would you want to come home to you? Be honest.
There are days like today where everything is right with the world. Maybe not the world outside my front door but where the world inside my little world feels perfect and amazing. It’s not always this way but in these moments of perfection where peace and contentment gently embrace me, I am truly grateful. My intention is to share some of that with you. That is my wish for you today, to be happy exactly where you are and with exactly who you are in this amazing moment.
I just read a great post about the desire of people to have respect and peace in these troubling times. Sometimes what we say and what we do contradicts one another. Hypocrisy is a disease that is growing at an alarming rate. We can’t have selective respect and we certainly can’t have selective peace. We either have it or we don’t. The hypocrisy comes into play when we allow our mind to separate who deserves our respect and who does not. It’s important to remember that we don’t always get what we desire but we do frequently get what we give. So ask that question to yourself and answer it honestly. Am I giving respect or am I giving respect to who I decide deserves it? Am I bringing peace to the world or am I bringing conflict, division and discord? Why do we even feel we are on a level to judge another human being let alone decide if they deserve our respect? We have an over inflated sense of self these days that bonds us with other people and gives us a collective opportunity and excuse to behave badly. We label people in a way that determines if they are on par or beneath us and then we wonder where the world has gone so wrong. The answer is simple and if you took an honest look, it would be clear. We speak out about speech toward one person but then we turn around and use that same hate speech toward someone else after of course we determine that person deserves it. Why can’t people see what is so plainly obvious? Maybe because they would have to admit they practice the same behavior they claim to abhor because well it’s different. Nope. Not different. It’s time we own who we’ve become and to stop making excuses. Let’s bring honesty back and shame hypocrisy into becoming a thing of the past. Let’s prove that peace and respect are truly priorities and then maybe we will see them emerge. We get more of what we focus on. As a whole, does it really appear that Americans practice respect or peace? Is that really their focus? Time to get real and be honest.
I woke up today feeling very grateful. I couldn’t help but allow my mind to travel back to a time of outhouses, oil lamps and no running water. I wonder what families talked about as they sat around the dinner table. There were no cell phones giving off notifications every second and no stories of impending doom coming from a news channel as the noise continuously blared from the tv. We are so fortunate but yet conversations would make you think the sky is getting ready to fall. What you talk about you get more of. How you think and where you place your focus determines what you attract more of. Resist and you attract more opportunities to do just that. Practice gratitude and the Universe delivers more situations to feel grateful for. Sometimes it is clear to see why we are in the state we are in but just for today, think about how lucky and blessed you are with all these modern conveniences. Don’t create drama, create peace and don’t fabricate problems where there are none. Change your thinking because after all, that is the only thing you have an ounce of control over. Use it in your favor. Change your world and the outside world will start to reflect what you see.
The sky’s the limit as long as you can drown out the voices who try to stifle your potential. As long as I can remember, my daughter has loved to sing. Some days she just wouldn’t stop and at times it was a bit excruciating. This Christmas my nephew gave her the microphone that paired with her cell phone and I watched her come alive. She was a true performer and the happiness beamed from her face as she belted out Let It Go. There has never been any stopping her with anything she decides to do which can be a real challenge if your sole job is to parent her. Defying all odds, she had the nerve to try out for Greek Sing and was ecstatic to call and tell me she was accepted to the group. That girl proves me wrong everyday in the best way. Don’t ever limit anyone. It’s not our job to kill someone else’s dream. Note to self…encourage and support. You never know what you are capable of until you try so how in the world can you know what someone else is capable of unless you encourage them to try.
I have discovered just how powerful the mind really is. It can be my greatest ally or my most dangerous enemy. It can talk me into believing nonsense and talk me out of doing something good for myself.
I have vowed to make it back to the gym this week. Every single hour of every day, I have allowed my thoughts to present an argument on why I do not need to go. We have to be honest about our thought. We have to be cautious on determining what is actually true and what we tell ourselves is true to fit a certain narrative. Honesty is tough to find these days and separating fact from opinion has become near impossible.
This is a reminder to myself and everyone reading that we have to be selective on what we allow our inner voice to tell us. We need to call it out for what it is by responding with the voice we can hear outside our head. The mind can play tricks on us and of course it wants to please us even if what it allows us to believe is far from the truth we need to hear.
So what do you think? Will I make it to the gym today? I can already hear that inner voice laughing in the background.