Your Words Kill

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I read a story today about a young boy who took his life because of some kids who humiliated him for having a colostomy bag. When I see this onslaught of condemnation toward fellow human beings I cannot for the life of me understand how people still don’t get it. Your words, your public and social bullying, your judgement and even your opinions could very well be responsible for killing another human being. When your blame and assault leaves someone in such despair that he takes his own life, do you really not get it? What matters more to you? Insulting a young person on Facebook and comparing him to someone who has done something horrific…getting your likes and cheers from like minded people…is that more important than someone’s life and dignity? Are people really a joke or the latest headline? What if YOU were that person being jeered at? What if it was your child? Do we have to partake in this ugliness and why? What purpose does it serve for the one who does it? I am far from perfect but I value life and I honestly do try to make corrections when I see the error of my ways. If there is someone who needs to read this. If maybe there is a chance it reaches one person, feel free to share. It’s time to change the world and take it in a new direction. Will you join me?

When Did Bullying Become a Movement?

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Bullying can be summed up as using superior strength or influence to intimidate someone usually to force someone to do what he or she wants.

I see it everywhere. It frightens me that this is the go to method to get things done these days. Just turn on the tv.

I am so confused today. Are we supposed to stand up to bullying or give into it? Does it depend on who is doing the bullying and if we support their cause? When did bullying become acceptable depending on who’s the victim and who’s the perpetrator. My God what is happening before our eyes and why have so many people become blind to it? There cannot be special rules for special people. Behavior is either acceptable or it is not period. We cannot allow it to be conditional. There are ways that work better than this. We have to be bigger, more disciplined and more willing to work together with other individuals in a way that is amicable and healthy. Screaming demands and threatening cannot be the path we take. We cannot support it or celebrate it. This is the force behind the crumbling that will lead to total destruction of order and civil communication. I will not support it under any circumstance and regardless of whether I support the cause of the group doing it. We have to make a stand in values like we do for tomorrow’s latest cause. Everyone wants to jump on the bus but who the hell is driving? And we wonder why kids are so confused and eating tide pods and snorting condoms these days? All they see are exceptions to what we teach them and mixed messages at an alarming rate. Being a parent and navigating my kids through all this nonsense is the hardest and most important job I will ever have. Double standards cannot exist ever. Not in my house.

Who Wants My Ticket? I’m Done With This Show!

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I am very disheartened by the news that so many performers are either backing out or simply afraid to perform at the inauguration. I don’t care who you voted for or how you feel about Donald Trump. This should be alarming for all of us. We call someone a bully and then in the next breath we stand together to bully anyone who stands in the way of how we think everything should be. The hypocrisy is so loud it is screaming for us to take notice. Our lives have started to take place in a circus tent where we have become the monkeys and we are putting on one hell of a show. When did it become so hard for people to be told no? We  will continue to bully and berate as we abuse the freedoms we were given to inflict our way. The truth is, there are more people than those like-minded few who we lock down in our inner circle. I don’t care what side your on or whether you lean this way or that. Last time I checked, the world was round and flat so there were no sides or tilt to one diresction or the other. The sides we speak of are of our own creation and the only reason we choose a side is to show that we are against the other. I don’t even want to talk about this anymore but is getting so out of control that it causes me so much distress. People against bullying bully. People who want to include everyone are dividing. Am I the only one who sees the hypocrisy here? We the people are fed up. I know this person is. Why even bother to spread a good word and be a decent human being when the rug is being yanked out from underneath me? When will it stop? When you get your way? When I get mine? What about when our ways are different? Should we fight to the death? Destroy each other and our country one day at a time at the cost of winning the golden trophy? You can have it. I’m done. Not everyone wants a ticket to this ridiculous circus. I know I don’t.

How Do You React To Intimidation?

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There is a stubbornness about me that never can bear to be frightened at the will of others. My courage always rises at every attempt to intimidate me~~Jane Austen 

I do not like conflict. I am peaceful by nature and when that peace is disturbed internally, I feel like a walking soda can that has been shaken up and left to possibly explode. What will happen when someone pulls on the tab? 

When it comes to being pushed around and intimidated, that soda settles right now. Somehow, someway, the explosion that seems imminent is calmed by something in me that is called to stand up for something that is right. I am a fighter of causes, a voice for the speechless, hope for the hopeless. It’s a curse and disguise all at the same time because it puts me in a vulnerable place. Someone has to do it and apparently someone is my middle name.

How could I back down when every instinctual feeling tells me I have to do what’s right? How could I live with myself if I walked away when I know I am meant to stand and fight?

How do you react to being pushed around or intimidated by someone? When you see something is all wrong, do you get involved and speak up or do you turn your head and look the other way?

The Truth About Vaccinations

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I have been reading several articles lately on vaccinating children. When I scroll through the comment section I am absolutely devastated. The fact is this, people will always disagree. You may feel so strongly about something but like it or not, someone else will undoubtedly believe the exact opposite of what you are so passionate about. Being a parent is so hard. You are responsible for this tiny little life that you bring into this world. That tiny little life, although not important to most of the world is now the center of your world. In fact, that precious little life is your WHOLE world.

I know it is hard to accept, but you do not have the right to make decisions for anyone else. You do have the right to bash, berate and try to humiliate others who will not choose the same. What does that make you? You may justify these unfortunate behaviors because you really believe in your cause, but at the end of the day you are just the school yard bully. Nobody likes a bully and bullying never leads to anything good. Have respectful conversations but respect others right to choose.

Many years ago, when my daughter was young, she had a febrile seizure a few days after her MMR vaccine. It started out like an ordinary day. The fever came on suddenly and quite honestly I had no idea anything was wrong. As I was putting her pajamas on, I watched as the color slowly drained from her face. She made an odd sound as she exhaled and I saw her eyes start to roll back in her head. That’s when it started, the worst 25 minutes of my entire life. The seizure did not kill her and some may argue the seizure is no big deal compared to the risk of not vaccinating her. The MMR vaccine did not kill her either. But, if the EMT in the ambulance who was administering the Valium to stop my daughters seizure was the type to obediently follow orders, my daughter might not be alive today. She told me she was not comfortable giving the amount of Valium the doctor ordered and I had to quickly make a choice. In a frantic moment as this child was convulsing helplessly in my arms, I chose to give her half. My daughter did not die that day but part of me did. No one can ever comprehend the unimaginable fear that paralyzed me in those crucial moments. I could do nothing but watch my child seize in my arms and bargain with God. Please God, if you let her live, I will this and I will that. I would have promised anything that day to save her life because without her I would have no life. She was my reason for everything back then. 25 minutes felt like an eternity that day. The Valium ultimately shut down her breathing, even half the dose. I cannot even begin to think of what the outcome would have been if that EMT did not make the choice to tell me she was not comfortable giving that larger dose. She had to be intubated and flown to a nearby hospital. I drove three horrendous hours not knowing how she was. Not a single word. I sat in horror agonizing over the last image I had of her tiny body convulsing in my arms. She was so tiny and so pale as I held her jerking body wishing the ambulance had wings and not those darn tires that seemed to be taking too long. I was alone, helpless, lost, scared just waiting for it all to stop. My head was spinning and it felt like a dream. One minute she was smiling and playing and the next minute….this. Just writing these words brings back the intense pain of those moments. I was mom, the one who was supposed to keep her safe. I was the one who gave her life but I had no power to save her precious life that day. All I could do was pray.

Looking back, I don’t know how I got through that day. I guess I really didn’t have a choice. I wish I could forget it, erase it from my memory and never think about it again. I am blessed to say, Kayleigh is alive and well. She is sixteen years old now and I thank God everyday for another day to spend with her.

Everyone has a story. Everyone has the right to choose. Not everyone’s story ended up with a positive spin. Vaccines come with a risk. Yes it is a risk to not vaccinate but we cannot ignore the fact that some children’s lives, families lives are forever changed by the decision to vaccinate their children. Show compassion and realize for some, every vaccination comes with fear. Go easy on people and maybe try and understand where they are coming from too. Because at the end of the day, you are solely responsible for that little person who depends on you to keep them safe in this great big world.