A Letter From The Future

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This is me writing you this letter on the last day of 2016. You made some amazing changes in your life this year. You found your happy place and you set up camp there. You remembered that the only thing that can get to you is the decision to let something affect you. You make your own choices now and you have learned that the only thing you can control is your own thoughts. What a difference staying calm and focused has made. You have stepped back and let everyone be more accountable for themselves. You have embraced that the same thing can be done many ways and your way is not the only way. You have spent more time going out at night and enjoying your life rather than sitting home worrying about things you cannot change. You let the small things slip away and you kept your eye on the prize of being present in your own life. You are different now. You are strong, confident and filled with a sense of peace that the strongest winds couldn’t blow away. I knew you could do it with determination and will and you are finally in a place that feels good, a place you want to stay. Welcome. I have been waiting for you to arrive.

They say hindsight is 20/20 so why not give it a try? Set a positive intention for the coming year. 

Back For An Encore

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I wrote this quite a long time ago. It is one of my best read posts and is still popular today. What is it about personal letters that we find so intriguing?  Here it is, back for an encore. If you have a favorite letter to someone you have written, please link it to my post. 

https://anewperspectiveperhaps.wordpress.com/2013/02/28/a-letter-to-my-godchildren/ 

A LETTER TO MY GODCHILDREN

I have loved you since the day you were born. I remember looking into your little eyes and holding you for the first time and a new chapter of my life began. I was your Godmother and responsible for your well being and for nurturing your soul. There was nothing I loved more than spending time with you and watching you grow. I remember your first steps and your first words. I always knew how smart you would become because you could remember every word to every video you watched. You would sit on the steps with your bottle when we didn’t know enough to put you to sleep. I watched you play basketball and soccer and sat proudly as you were inducted into the National Honor Society. You always filled my heart to the brim with love and I am so proud of the person you’ve become. I remember sitting at your graduation wondering when did time slip away. Where was the little boy that used to make me laugh until I cried. Remember when you came to visit and you experienced your 1st round about? You were so funny, I couldn’t help but drive around 100 times! The memory still brings a smile to my face. I looked forward to summer, when you would come to visit me, and it broke my heart when you would drive away. I missed so much of your every day life living so far away, but have always held you close in my heart. I will always be here to offer advice or if you need it, just to listen. You are safe with me and I will always take care of you. You were my first love, and taught me how it felt to care about another more than myself.. Life is wonderful. Let it be. Life is an adventure, sometimes it’s bumpy, but I promise it will be amazing. Sit back and enjoy the ride. Don’t get caught up worrying about the journey ahead, enjoy where you are today. If you are stuck between the past and the future you will never be present. It is only when you learn to be present that you will find clarity. Quiet the storm inside your mind so you can find your inner peace, for it is there where you find all the answers you seek. Learn to feel peace and truth, it will always see you through. You have a wonderful life ahead of you. Get caught up in the moments that serve you, they are like the wind, feel them and just let the others pass through. I can’t wait to watch your life unfold. Let it be. Wherever you are, be there completely. That is the secret. Trust in God, and in your own instincts, and trust your life will always be as it should. Don’t fight the circumstances , people, or situations that cross your path, for they are important lessons shaping you into the person you are meant to be. Embrace them, every one.
Little girl with the big blue eyes and curly hair. Could any child be more beautiful than you? You probably never noticed me stare, but sometimes I couldn’t take my eyes off you. You were always so silly and sneaky as a little girl. Hiding from grandma and sticking your tongue out at your mom.You used to lovingly bend over to give Kayleigh a kiss and then hit her when you thought no one was watching. Of course you were only 2, but I knew you were going to give us all a run for our money. You, my little God daughter would be a fun little challenge. You were always so fiery and full of life. I am still amazed you can eat an entire box of chocolate in one sitting and not even gain a pound. You are independent and not afraid of standing alone. You are caring and I can tell so many people admire you. I see that because I stalk you on Facebook and twitter. That’s my job you see, to watch over you and guide you to stay on the right path. There are so many challenges being a teenage girl. I know how hard it is for you. You are smart and kind and you will have a hard time because you are as beautiful on the outside as you are on the inside. That is a combination that causes others to become jealous. I know your heart is guarded and you are so quiet. Learn to open up and love with your whole heart. It is then that you will know real joy. You are serious and wise beyond your years. Be playful, laugh and put a silly mustache on your finger and hold it up to your mouth. Its okay to be silly once in awhile. Look at your relatives. And never, ever stop dancing. I remember watching you dance the part of the doll from the Nutcracker in the living room when you were a little girl. I saw your passion way back then that you carry deep inside your amazing soul. Embrace that passion and put it into everything you do. I remember the tears welling up in my eyes as I watched you finally get your chance to be that doll up on stage. Oh, how you shined! You danced like an angel and it was a moment I would never forget. Your dream of dancing that part and my dream of watching you finally came true. You are sometimes a monster on the outside, but as frail and tender as a kitten on the inside. Let others get to know you because they will really miss out if you don’t let them in. You are smart, and strong, and have so much inside of you to give. Stay true to who you are because you are one of a kind. Remember life is a dance. Be present in every scene. Carry that confidence and grace you feel into everything you do. And don’t forget to relax your face and breathe. You can always count on your poise and strong dancer legs to support you through the most difficult times. Don’t forget to smile and enjoy every minute, because unlike a recital, life doesn’t always offer an encore, but will be filled with many scenes. I love you to pieces and wish you could see yourself through my eyes. I am so proud to be your Aunt and your Godmother. If you ever feel sad or alone, read this and remember you are loved…..

A Letter to My Teenage Son

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Today you are a teenager. It seems like yesterday I was bending over your crip watching you sleep. I know this may sound kind of creepy but I still watch you sleep. I can’t help but wonder what amazing things you do in your dreams. You amaze me every single day. From the very beginning, I knew you were different. Not different in an odd way but amazingly unique, especially for a boy. Even the way your mind works is unique. You see things from a different angle than most and you are able to to reach a destination taking a path that most would never discover. You are gentle and kind, sensitive and silly. Your heart is enormous and those little thoughtful acts I catch you do, fill my heart with pride. You are competitve but mostly playful. Your laugh is infectious, it always makes me smile. You do things 100%. You feel things that intensely too. You are so smart and scientific to the point I worry about your love to experiment. You are free from worry and always comfortable to just be you with no concern about what anyone thinks. You are less concerned with popularity and more concerned with video games and doing the things that make you happy. You Are going to do something amazing because you ARE amazing. All those qualities that are so different than the rest make you stand out in a way you cannot help but shine. That’s what you always are to me, a bright light on a gloomy day, a kind word on my hardest day. Happy birthday to the love of my life. Always do you because you are perfect just the way you are. Carry your silliness and happiness and compassion for others into adulthood and never stop being sensitive and kind. Never let anyone dull your sparkle because where I stand, your future is beautiful and bright.

Dear Teacher, It’s Me. ADD

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Dear Teacher,

Hi. My name is ADD. You think I look familiar but actually, we have never met. I believe you have mistaken me for ADHD who sits across form me fidgeting in his seat. We may look the same, but we are not the same. I don’t fidget. I sit quietly still and I have learned over time how to blend in. I try and not bring attention to myself. I hope you do not see me, that you never call on me. I don’t have many answers. Often times, I do not even understand the questions. I see everyone around me working and I sit here not knowing what to do. If I ask for help, the other kids might laugh at me. They are so smart and I am, well, quiet. I look busy like everyone else. I hold my pencil to my paper and I move it around but when I take it home to finish ,my mom doesn’t understand why it’s blank. We argue a lot over homework and sometimes she cries. She doesn’t understand why I can’t get my work done in school and neither do I. I feel ashamed. When I am supposed to be thinking about my work, my mind races with other things. What should I have for lunch and which avatar will I be when I get home to play that video game? I see the teachers mouth moving but I can’t hear her talking. What is wrong with me? Why can’t I concentrate? Will I ever be normal? Will anyone ever see that I need help. Maybe I shouldn’t be so quiet. Maybe I shouldn’t sit so still. Maybe I should act out like the other kids who get so much attention. The teacher sees them. Why can’t she see me? Oh that’s right, I was writing a letter.

Dear Teacher,
I hope someday you see me. I sit in the back of your class. I am quiet. I behave. I look busy but I can’t do my work. I need your help. Maybe if you walked around the class you would see my paper is blank. Maybe if you see my paper is blank, you will help me and I won’t have to be embarrassed to ask in front of the other kids. Maybe if you see me I will feel like you care and I will have the courage to ask for the help I know I need. Maybe I’ll just sit in the back of class and never say a word. My mom is waiting to help me at home. I can get the work done there. Maybe you will never know I can’t do it by myself. Maybe you just don’t care. 

Sincerely, 

ADD

A Letter To My Daughter On Her 1st Day of High School!

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I wrote this a year ago but wanted to share it again.

Dear Kayleigh,

I cannot imagine how you must be feeling today. Maybe you are old enough and wise enough to see the momentous significance of this day and maybe not. I am here to tell you this. Today is a huge day. It is a day to live in each moment and take it all in. Pause before you walk through the front door of the next 4 years of your life. Take note of what you’re feeling. You will want to remember. What do you see? How do you feel? What are you thinking? Write it all down so you will never forget. Will your heart beat faster because you are scared or excited or will you be questioning whether you picked the right outfit and whether you should have curled or straightened your hair? Take a deep breath and bask in the moment of the beginning of a new and exciting chapter of your life. This chapter is important. It will shape you and define you and serve as a pathway to the next chapter in life.

Look around at all the faces. You will see them every day and some days I am sure you will wish you didn’t have to see them at all. The truth is, one day you will step out of those doors on the last day of your senior year and those people will no longer be part of your everyday life. I promise you will miss them. Your heart will ache for them and the safety and familiarity of school will always leave a little hole in your heart. There is something very special and bonding about having your high school experience in common. Don’t compare yourself to anyone. Remember there is only one person in the world that is you. You are unique and special just the way you are. Don’t ever try to be like anyone else. Always believe in yourself, and listen to the little compass inside of you. It will always let you know when something is wrong or something is right.

You will learn so many things these next few years and most of it will not be taught from any book. You will learn about life, and love, and success, and how to handle disappointments. You will probably find your first love and have your heart broken beyond repair. Learn that each morning brings a new day. Take comfort in that. Every day you have the chance to be a better version of you. You will make mistakes and you will move on and grow. Be the person you want to be. Bring kindness and forgiveness and a smile to everyone you see. Years from now, when someone hears your name, do you want them to remember you with a scowl on your face or with a great big smile? You will be remembered by the people whose lives you will touch. Someday, someone will look back and remember a kind deed or a kind word that you offered them. Be confident and kind and remember, even though you think you know it all, you really don’t. Use this time to pay attention, to learn and grow. Bottle it up and take it all in. Study hard, be a good friend, and just have fun. You will look back someday despite the drama and the lessons and the tests, broken friendships, broken hearts, mistakes, accomplishments and realize that these next four years will be some of the most memorable in your life. Don’t get caught up in the small stuff. Nothing is the end of the world except one very important detail. Do not do anything that will take away your self respect. What other people think about you is not that important, BUT what YOU think about YOURSELF means everything! Respect yourself and others will respect you too. Do not think you are above anyone but know you are certainly not beneath them. Don’t judge. Find the common in everyone. Remember, at the end of the day, we all have the same feelings and similar experiences. Treat yourself and others with respect. It will help you sleep a whole lot better at night.

Work hard at everything you do. Don’t do anything half way. Push yourself and challenge yourself and don’t ever settle for less than what you are capable of. Every choice you make will affect how others will see you and more importantly how you see yourself. Make wise ones and don’t be in a hurry. These years will go fast and life gets harder and harder with each new responsibility. Take time to find something to be grateful for everyday. Gratitude brings more of what you want and love. Don’t waste time being jealous. There will always be someone prettier, smarter, more popular, more liked. Don’t compete. Practice forgiveness and compassion towards everyone. Carrying anger is like a poison that slowly kills you over time. Teach people how to treat you and be the best version of yourself everyday.

I am so excited to watch you grow these next few years. I can’t help but remember that time in my own life and feel a little envious of how lucky you are to be knocking on the door of this wonderful short time of yours. I am proud of you and I love you and I know these next few years will be special ones! It seems like just yesterday that I held you in my arms for the very first time. It is time to let you fly and fly you will.

Thank You MOM

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How do you properly say thank you to someone who has cared for your body inside her own? How do you say thank you to someone who gave up hours of her own sleep to care for and cater to your every need? How do you show your appreciate for the one person who has always been honest, even when you couldn’t be honest with yourself? How do show your love to the one person who loved you through the times you believed you were unlovable and stood by you when the rest of the world seemed to turn away?

How do you convince someone that they have been a wonderful mother when they always feel they could have done better? How do you say that your best is and always will be good enough and more than your kids have ever deserved? How do you tell that person who is constantly second guessing herself that she is better than most. How do you convince someone who has given every second of her life worrying and loving and standing by you through every single moment of your life, the good, the bad, the difficult and the amazing that she has been a tower of strength to get you through it all? How do you tell her that now you are a mom and you understand the amount of sacrifice, the agony of watching your own children’s pain, the years of disappointment, pride and immense love that you had no idea existed until you too became a mom.

The truth is this. One day we are a selfish young woman and the next we become a selfless mom. There is no preparing someone to be a mom. No directions, no instructions….nothing. We are given this precious life who we are solely responsible for and it is wonderful and scary and painful and amazing. There is a special bond between a mother and her child and the day she holds that little baby in her arms for the first time, their hearts become one. There are no words, no amount of distance that could ever break that bond.

It’s not easy being a mom, I know that now. There is no greater hurt than when a child you sacrificed everything for looks you in the eye with contempt and disrespect. What do you do? You love them anyway. That’s just what moms do. The strong and loving ones do anyway. You love your children through every slammed door, every mean word, every hurtful conversation. You forgive them and you choose love just like that very first day when you looked in that child’s eyes for the first time. The most precious gift my mom ever taught me is that love is a choice we make each and every day. Love doesn’t always come naturally. Love does not erase anger and disappointment. That is why we make the choice to love our kids through it all, even when they don’t deserve it.

Thank you Mom for choosing to love me through the times I made it difficult. Thank you for being a daily part of my life even now that I am an adult and have kids of my own. Thank you for loving me and being the one and only person who has always been there no matter what you were going through yourself. And thank you for being the wonderful grandmother you are and giving my kids what I am sometimes not able to give myself. You are a kind, giving, supportive, wonderful woman. If only you could see yourself through my eyes. I realize there are no words to give enough thanks. There is no gift special enough to let you know how very special you are to me. But yet somehow, I know that you know how much you mean to me. Sometimes it’s in the little things, like the 5 times I call you everyday. But sometimes, it is just something felt in the heart and I feel it so I know you feel it too. Our hearts are one and I am grateful for you each and every day.

Thank you mom for being anything and everything I ever needed. Thank you for the lessons, the words of encouragement and for just letting me know if I ever got lost in the world, you would always be home. Thank you for teaching me to always make myself a priority too. Sometimes we get so wrapped up in our giving and loving others that we lose ourselves. It is only when we love and are kind to ourselves that we can truly love and be good to others. Happy Mothers Day to my hero, role model, biggest supporter and most of all to my best friend. I am so blessed and grateful to have you in my life. Chance made you my mother, love made you my friend.

A Special Gift

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Something wonderful and unexpected happened last night. I was rushing around trying to get things ready for the morning when I poked my head in my sons room to put away some laundry. I noticed a piece of paper on his dresser with writing in multiple colors. As I picked it up and started reading it, it didn’t take long for the tears to well up in my eyes and slowly start to slide down my face. I wish I could share the details of what I read with you but I realized quickly it was only meant for Chases eyes.

It’s no surprise my daughter had a very difficult transition into middle school. It breaks my heart to even imagine how awful it must have been for her. So there, on Chases dresser was A Guide to Middle School written by Kayleigh just for Chase. Her advice was mature and kind and practical. I really couldn’t believe my eyes. It warmed my heart to know she was looking out for her little brother. She really is growing up and turning into a very kind young lady. I am so proud of her for who she is, her strength of character, and what she has overcome along the way. I couldn’t help but think of my blog post titled Letter to My Daughter on Her First Day of High School. I can’t help but smile to myself as I wonder if there’s a little bit of me inside of her.