When Expectations Fall Short

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Don’t be mad at the situation, be mad at your expectations.  

I read this line somewhere today and it jumped off the page and poked me in the arm. It’s very consistent with many of my posts this weekend and this lesson wanted to kick me in the backside one more time to make sure I don’t forget. I thought it was worth sharing so here it is one more time.

Don’t be mad at the situation, be mad at your expectations.

Should I Open The Door?

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Why in the world do we choose anger? Why do we hold onto it? It feels awful, it wastes precious time we can never get back, but still somehow, it often wins out.

Every time it’s someone’s birthday, we have dinner at their favorite restaurant. My son has been counting the days to order his beloved macaroni and cheese at Outback. When we showed up last night, there was a 50 minute wait. I was so mad he would eat pizza on his birthday so he wouldn’t be late to meet his friends skating later that night. Outback was just not going to work out and still I chose to let it get the better of me. Even though he was smiling saying “This is the best birthday ever”, I just couldn’t shake the mad.

I woke up this morning and my husband is gone. He has a full weekend of work ahead of him and I have a full weekend of being alone. Is it his fault? Is work where he wants to be when the weather is supposed to be gorgeous? Of course not, so why the mad?

I guess sometimes it’s hard when reality is much different than the way we want something to be. Being stuck in mad though takes away any chance of experiencing the unexpected that is waiting for me to move beyond my silly emotions. The best moments are often spontaneous so maybe I should brush myself off and carry on. Who knows what the day has in store for me if I just give it a tiny chance? Opportunity can knock but I have to make the decision to open the door.

Victim Drowns in Lake Thunderbird Today

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We went to the lake yesterday. I was tired and it was hot and we forgot to bring a blanket and chairs. Just like that, I went from completely looking forward to something to just plain mad. I was mad while we sat there on a small towel in dirt. I was mad at the people in the water because we had no floats. I was mad at the ants crawling all over my legs. I was mad all the way home and for hours after too. I was mad we lived so far away from our families. I was mad people try and plan our lives and our days. I was mad people expect us to always go along whatever the plan. I was just plain mad and there was no getting around it.

I realized after a good long talk that my mad was not over forgetting the chairs at all. That’s what triggered me to fall deeper into it but it was really about so much more. That is what is so important about communication. It’s imperative to get things off your chest and be honest about what is really going on. Often times I put on a brave face or I let things slide to keep the peace but that is exactly how the little things grow into bigger ones. Before you know it, there is a wildfire burning out of control taking down everyone in its path.

As I went to sleep last night I was frustrated with myself. I know how precious time is and it is so wasteful to use it on being mad. I am responsible for keeping myself in check. I am responsible for not letting things mount up inside me because I choose to keep them to myself. I felt so ashamed and silly when I checked the news updates and one read Victim Drowns In Lake Thunderbird Today. I sat at that lake yesterday while someone breathed his last breath. A good reminder that our amount of time here is unknown. It’s never worth a single second choosing to be mad.