The Truth No One Wants To Hear

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Many of you don’t know how my struggle with the school system ruined a handful of years of my life. I remember the days when I would sit at meetings with teachers and administrators demanding they follow through on my sons accommodations so he had the chance to be successful at school. It’s all about the children, that’s what they say until something becomes inconvenient and then it’s a list of reasons why they cannot follow the accommodations your child so desperately needs. I was called a bully for fighting for my child and the top of the top threatened to cancel my sons 504 meetings. Imagine if I marched into the school lobby, the principals office or stood outside a classroom window holding a sign with my closest friends screaming “DO YOUR JOB!” What do you think the reaction would be then? Would teachers rally behind me for a common cause because you know, it IS about the children?

Don’t get me wrong. I have made peace with my own hell. It almost destroyed me but I realized that if the end goal was truly getting the help Chase needed, I had to take a different approach. I stopped demanding and started reaching out. How can we give Chase what he needs together? What is something that would work for all of us? Slowly and surely the teachers attitudes began to change. Today I am happy to report that this has been an amazing year because finally after fighting a hard battle, I finally got the type of teachers that Chase needed. They go above and beyond, not just for him but for all their students. I am so grateful for them. It was the state of Oklahoma and the teachers here that taught me a hard lesson. Making demands turns a deaf ear and makes people resist what you demand from them even more. This isn’t the way. I support their cause but I do not support their path to get there. There are two sides to every story and unfortunately the media chooses a side and that is the only story you will ever hear. This is the first time in years that the officials we elected did something positive for teachers. Is it really a surprise that they are resentful and angry that they are on the receiving end of demands and chants? Teachers lining the Capitol and chanting “Do Your Job” and “We Won’t Leave”. You bet they’re pissed because they worked long and hard to make this much progress. This situation is lose-lose for everyone. Maybe it’s time to rethink this plan and try again. Just a different perspective from the one you are hearing. Just my opinion but attacking the people who could give you what you want and humiliating them with words on signs is probably not going to work but then again, what do I know?

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What Difference Does This Make?

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We have become a society that can make a big deal over anything and at the same time pay little attention to the things that really matter.

I have learned to ask myself a few important questions before I engage in becoming part of the craziness.

1) Do I really care about this?

2) Is this really a big deal?

3) How will this affect my life a week, a year, 10 years from now?

4) Is this even worth giving any thought?

Don’t get caught up in other people’s need to debate every single thing. People disagree because they can and they throw around opinions as if they even matter. I often remind myself, my opinion is just one of many and at the end of the day it doesn’t mean a thing.

America, Are You Being Played?

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Sometimes I wonder if people will ever get it. I don’t often comment directly on worldly events but each day that passes by, I feel more embarrassed to call myself an American. When I see people line up to fight to the death with family and friends over the latest headline, I wonder how such trivial matters have become worth dying for and how being a decent human being has become a thing of the past. I shake my head as I wonder repeatedly how such nonsense can draw such attention and conflict. Someone from a private meeting attracts the attention of the circus media and by golly folks we have another show. We are the ones being played by attending another performance but go ahead and waste hours of your lives arguing over matters that are so ridiculous. He said, she said. He tattled, she reported. We are like a middle school playground and frankly it’s not only embarrassing but downright shameful. This game has consequences beyond the pettiness that plays out in Washington. And we the people line up along each fence and join in the childish behavior like our lives depend on it. Am I seriously the only person who sees through this stuff? Why would we purposely cause drama and blow every single thing so far out of proportion that we are seriously at war with one another over everything and anything? I won’t play this game because I realize how damaging it really is. I am surprised people are so willing to be played by their hatred for a president or hatred toward contradicting political parties. How sad and wasteful of the time we’ve been given but my opinion is one of many and we certainly have no shortage in sight when it comes to them. They are a dime a dozen and everyone of us has more than are necessary but we will stand up and speak our truth til we are blue in the face rather than make a single move to work toward cooperation and peace. We keep telling ourselves we are fighting for a cause, making a difference. Look around you because we certainly are. We are leaving our mark no different than a dog. This is our legacy. Own it. I’m not proud.

When Priorities Are Lost (Unity Part 2)

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One thing I have focused on lately is my priorities. The outside world cannot reach in and distract me as long as I gently remind myself of the things that really matter. For me, the top two would be God and Family. When I do my best to live in the image of God, I am able to soften. I am tired of the bickering and watching people celebrate things like what color state they live in. I look around and I celebrate kindness, unity, self restraint. I no longer strive for tough love but am working to reach a new level of gentleness. Is there a God? The truth is I have no idea but as long as there’s a chance, I will continue to believe. We have replaced goodness, compassion, kindness and the desire to be one with things that make me feel ashamed just thinking about them. The things that bring people together today are conditions and illusions. Fighting and resisting against something or someone unites people more than believing in and working towards something. We bind together in negativity. It is destroying humanity and replacing civility. We embrace it and we celebrate the things that are insignificant to the spirit. Real unity doesn’t come from there. Happiness is fleeting when we base it on things like who is leading our government, our states. Who is leading the condition of the heart and spirit? When have we placed political leaders in the role of Gods and focused on the color of our state instead of the condition of our soul and mind? Have we once considered what kind of world we are creating for our children? We’ve become obsessed with making a stand for the latest trend but who is making a stand for what matters most? Winning doesn’t happen in the polls or in Washington D.C. Winning is when families and friends spend precious time breaking bread together and loving one another…wait for it….without conditions. When we choose political affiliation over people in our lives, something is very wrong. So many are lost today and I hope they examine their priorities and set them straight. Our purpose is to love and to make the most of our time here. It’s to leave the world better, not more bitter. Turn off the news. Put down your phone and remove the debilitating distractions. Be more focused and concerned with the people you are raising and the ones who raised you. Set your attention on the people who really matter. Unite there and then extend that love and unity into the world. At the very least, take an honest look at where you are investing time, emotion, focus and energy. Being honest might actually hurt but its the only way to start to heal.

I Want To Destroy You Mentality

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It makes me sad to think that there are some people who will use any and all opportunities to destroy someone. I cannot for the life of me understand how such disgust and hatred toward someone can be the driving passion in so many people’s lives. I’ve watched it publicly and I’ve witnessed it on a personal level as a persons preoccupation with destroying someone becomes not only an obsession but also a roadblock in their own personal lives. Imagine if people put that much focus, attention and intention into making their own lives better. How different the result might be. 

Here’s something to think about today. Could using the time we have to judge and destroy others really be the reason we were given this beautiful opportunity to walk through this life? Could we be reduced to such a self sabotaging purpose with all the other possibilities still in our reach? This wanting to destroy others mentality disrespects the time we’ve been given to really do something worthwhile. Why is it easier to hate than it is to embrace and to love? I will never understand it. Never. And I am grateful for that.

Let’s Rip the Circus Tent Down

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When did people become so small? When did someone’s need to make a point and be right far exceed our need for them to sit down and be quiet? When did every single action cause a debate and become breaking news when people purposely try and demean, devalue and humiliate other human beings? When did we accept the use of a camera for people to make complete idiots out of us hard working Americas trying to make ends meet and raise our children into decent human beings when all the role models they see on tv are ugly and mean spirited? Their chance and need for fame outweighs any concern for the destruction they cause around them while they play their little games. I often wonder what I would see if I could look into people’s hearts. I have a sick feeling I would see nothing but an empty hole. I will not become the smallness around me and I will not allow it to take control and change me because it sometimes makes me feel bitter. I will take the energy and use it to be even kinder and more compassionate then the day before. I will not become this vile, disease that is infecting good people because they have become blind to what really matters. I am fed up and mostly I am sad when I turn on tv and see the circus we’ve become. Let’s rip this circus tent down and maybe these performers will just go away. They don’t really represent us so how the hell did they get where they are?

I’m Right! No, I’m Right!

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In a time where so many of us see the world differently, how can you be sure your version is right? Why are you so positive that you are the one thinking logically and others are not thinking clearly? Have you even ever asked yourself this question? We only know what we are open to hearing information about but are most of us truly open to hearing information that contradicts our personal opinion? I watch people swear with absolute assertion that something is matter of fact even when half the population sees the same situation in an opposite manner. Could it be that half of us are right and the other half are just plain crazy? We really need to start thinking about this. Or could it be that we only focus on the so called people and facts that feed our narrative so we never see the complete picture at all? Something to think about.