Pick A Lane

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I failed miserably yesterday. Only moments after leaving the house, I let the negativity around me flood my boat. Eventually it sank. Those people that wouldn’t let me over when roads merged into one lane won yesterday. The few people that walk in the middle of the track who evidently don’t know if they belong in the walking or jogging lane did me in. My sons bad test grade, dishes and garbage in the bedrooms, annoying wind, teachers that will never understand all landed me in bed last night with a painful migraine. It’s like I stepped out of the house and screamed,”Here I am! Come at me bro!” So how do we build up our defenses so we are unscathed by the things that really shouldn’t matter? At least not to the point of ruining a perfectly beautiful day. For me, it comes down to being grounded and feeling balanced. As soon as I start feeling like everything’s spinning out of control I clam up and panic. I long for my toes to feel heavy on my yoga mat and feel that connection to Mother Earth. So today, I will try to ground myself so those little imbalances will not loosen the grip of my feet planted firmly underneath me. No more wobbling or weak knees for me. I will stand confident and strong and remind myself the sky is not falling. It really wasn’t that bad of a day. My mind tricked me into believing it was so I lost my way for a second or two. The connection of the body, mind and spirit is truly amazing. We have to know ourselves well enough to know what lane to get in so we can move full speed ahead on the right one that will take us home. When one falters, we have the other two to fall back on. Just get in the right lane and hit cruise. You will survive and tomorrow is another day. 

Are You Open To A New Perspective?

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Sometimes letting go is simply changing the labels you place on an event. Looking at the same event with fresh eyes~Steve Maraboli

This is what anewperspectiveperhaps is all about. It’s finding a new way to look at older ideas, thoughts, beliefs, situations, people, relationships, the past and anything else that has been holding you back. This is the secret to finding peace. This is the key that unlocks the door to love. The mind is a powerful thing if you allow it the ability to change. You cannot change your circumstances but you can change the way you look at them. This allows you the freedom to let go, accept what is, forgive, understand and maybe, if you’re lucky, find a way to move on. 

You Spent How Many Hours At The Gym?

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I remember a time long ago when I went to the gym several times a week. I was doing kick boxing, bench stepping. You name it, I did it. No matter how hard I worked, my body seemed to stay the same. Several years older now, I finally get it. Too much of anything is never good and eventually, if you are like me, you will get bored and start to resent it. Life is about balancing the mind, body and spirit. If you want to improve and you want to grow, you have to continuously work on all three simultaneously. I have the same body I did 15 years ago without killing myself at a gym. I am the same weight and to be honest I finally feel completely comfortable in my own skin. Why did I feel so unattractive then and so fantastic now? What could possibly be the difference?  I guess what it all comes down to is you can change your body all you want, but if you’re trapped in the same mind, the same way of thinking, you will never notice a single difference. The mind, more than anything else, determines how you feel. Change your mind, and your body changes too. That is the order it worked for me.  I have started to balance weights, fun cardio, yoga and at the same time, spend time doing what feels good to my soul. Everything in moderation, focus divided between all three parts. That is the real secret to looking and feeling your best. And if I feel like skipping a class, I simply skip it without guilt and absent of regret. Sometimes a day floating in the pool is the exercise I need for my soul. Look inside to see what you need, that should guide your exercise for the day. Today, it’s yoga for me, where the mind, body and spirit meet on the mat as one. What is it you need to exercise today?

Lost in a Fog

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Time was a thief,

The darkness crept in quietly, slowly, ripping one memory at a time.
Tearing the moments and the pictures from her soul like the words from a mime

Knee deep in confusion. not knowing who to trust,
Her head always throbbing, she swore it would bust
One minute here and the next somewhere else,
The line between reality and fiction was turning to mush

Her eyes grew so cold, a blank stare of glass,
Was she still even in there, was this just a mask
Her life was a dance, she twirled in the shadows,
Conversation became like water, so cold and so shallow

Trapped in her body and tied to her life,
Like a ball and chain that would always bring strife
Lost in a sea of nameless faces
One day at a time, the chalkboard erases

Until one night, while lying in bed
the thief came back in, this time took her breath
She remembered it all, the years, all the faces,
She remembered her name, her husband, the places

She was free at last, unchained from her mind
That had slowly forgotten who she was over time
She will dance once again as she takes one last look
At the ones who stood by her and she left them her book

A book filled with stories, not gone after all
The memories, her life, in the book all along
They cried as the words seemed to dance on the stage,
She left it all there, her life on a page

Inspired by The Daily Post

Prompt: fog
Form: elegy

There’s No Place Like Home

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I took my mom to yoga class for the first time today. From the minute we walked in the house, she has been in bed. It’s funny, I remember back to when I did my first class. I swore I was sick. I came home, laid down on the couch and fell asleep for two hours.

I believe many of us mistaken feeling tired for actually feeling relaxed. It took me some time to realize that when the body was relaxed enough to lay down and my mind was quiet enough to turn off, I had finally discovered the true art of feeling relaxed. We are so busy and so uptight that we don’t even really know what relaxed feels like at all. Once we learn though, we never forget. Yoga has changed my life. Its a place my soul feels very much at home. What exactly do I mean by home? It is a place my mind, body and spirit feel at peace, comfortably content to just be wherever I am, whatever time it may be. They say “there’s no place like home” and I’m starting to really believe that’s true.

Shut Up!

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For most of us, life starts back up today. I awoke with that gnawing tug of uncomfortable pain that I should be doing something, anything, everything. Time to rip the tree down, time to clean the house, time to go food shopping. This year I am committed to stifling that nagging voice that is a constant thief of my inner peace. I realize that the pang of anxiety I feel is life’s expectations lining up for me to take on. The bottom line is this, you don’t have to be the fastest or most dedicated rat in the race. In fact, don’t think of life as a race at all. It should be the exact opposite, savoring and lingering in every moment. Tell your mind the only way to finish a marathon is slow and steady and spend an extra hour in bed today. You determine the pace of your own life and choose wisely because you are the only one who has to live it. Slow down, take a breath and don’t forget to live in between the list of things you tell yourself you have to do. Shut up mind! I’m going back to bed.

Is Your Mind Trustworthy?

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What do you see in the picture? Can you trust what you believe you see? How many times do you swear something is one way and convince yourself it must be true because you saw it with your own eyes?

I did this little experiment and I found the results fascinating. My son loves chocolate covered almonds. I was going out the other night and he begged me to bring him some home. As I was paying for them at the register, the worker asked if I had seen the ones that look like green olives. I went back to take a look and couldn’t resist buying some of those green little beauties as well. When I got home I told my son the green olives I had at the restaurant that night were so delicious I brought some home for him to try. I popped one in his mouth and the look on his face was priceless. He was totally repulsed and ran to the garbage can to spit it out. That is when I informed him what was in his mouth was really a chocolate covered almond in disguise. He tried the same trick on his sister and had the same result. Isn’t it amazing how easily our minds can be misled? Remember this lesson. It is an important one.

Choose Your Thoughts Carefully

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Do you ever have those days you just feel unsettled? You even feel anxious just by being in your own skin? I am having one of those days. I image the only thing worse than being in my skin would be standing on the outside and having to be in my company. I have things on my mind. Troubles get to me. Bad relationships get to me and more than anything, what is going on around the world gets to me. I write about it all yes and that does help provide relief but the truth is I am a fixer. It is hard for me to sit back and watch when there is nothing I can do to change a situation I am aware of. I do not like things to be chaotic or unfinished. I like to deal with things and then put them behind me. There are some things that just cannot be fixed or better yet they are not my things to even fix in the first place. It’s hard for me to understand the concept of feeling stuck. It’s uncomfortable and awkward like standing in quicksand and not being able to escape. The more you fight it and the more you move, the faster you sink, so instead you just breathe through it until there is no air left to breathe.

What do you do when you feel anxious inside? What do you do to temporarily halt the thoughts inside your head so you can escape the agony they inflict that sneaks up when you are looking the other way. I write. I used to run. I ran so much I couldn’t stop. At 3:00am or 5:00pm you would see me on a path running as fast as I could to escape the torture of my own mind. It’s all a waiting game, you against the clock, tick-tock. You win a round and then time eventually knocks you down. That is why you have to breathe through it. Everything eventually passes and there is power in that knowledge. Whether you’re in a slump, trapped by reoccurring thoughts or whatever else, take comfort in the certainty that each moment brings something entirely new.

Most things are not a big deal. It is that something inside of us that makes things worse than they really are that is our worst enemy of all. Become friends with your mind and redirect your thoughts to find the path to a better a place. A fellow blogger mentioned that she heard this analogy the other day. Thoughts are the leaves and your brain or mind is the tree. Thoughts, like leaves change over time. They grow, change colors and eventually fall off. What a clever way to look at taking control of your thoughts. So, just for today, remember when you grow new thoughts to make them good ones and stay mindful about what your voice is telling you because that is what you will start to believe.

Is Your Mind Friend or Foe?

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I saw this quote on Facebook today. I read it, stopped what I was doing, focused and read it again. As I read the words I realized how true this really is. I remember so many times I was walking into something I felt would be difficult. Actually I knew it would be awful, but the way my mind blew everything out of proportion, the thinking part was actually worse than anything else. Our mind can be our best friend or our worst enemy. It can trick us and twist things and make a mountain out of a tiny mole hill. I wish I had an answer on how to stop it from happening. I really don’t think you can. Maybe, just recognizing and being aware that this happens will at least be enough to calm yourself enough to have the courage to get through anything that stands in your way. There are some things we just have to get through. No-one can do it for us. We have to find the confidence and the faith and the perseverance to crash right through the very thing we would rather avoid. These are the moments that define us and change who we are. There is no way around them and we can’t rush the journey. All we can do is be patient and breathe. It will pass like everything else and we may find out just how strong we really are as we finally get beyond what has been holding us back and in the end we may laugh as we discover the whole time, our own mind was the biggest obstacle of all.

The Power We Hold

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Recently I watched a video on a fellow bloggers site. It was a video of a handful of women who didn’t feel very good or confident about themselves. They were offered a beauty patch that they would wear for a week and report by video journal any changes they noticed taking place. The results were amazing! At first, the girls didn’t notice any difference, but by the end of the week the changes in their self confidence were unexplainable. The way they saw themselves was completely transformed into something positive and beautiful. They were completely amazed to find out the patches contained dove soap. That was all.

The bottom line here is that the mind is a powerful tool. However, if used against us it can be a debilitating weapon that holds us prisoner by its own negative thoughts. The amazing part? All it takes is a few powerful suggestions to manipulate it to see ourselves and life an entirely new and positive way.

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. We too have the power to build others up. Our words and our actions and years of negative interactions can destroy the very people we claim to love. On the other hand, all it takes is a little verbal coaching and kindness on our part to completely change the life of another. I am doing this little experiment now myself and I am excited to post what I have discovered on my journey when I am finally done. However, I don’t really think I will ever be done. What I discovered is that when my words are the reason for a smile on someone else’s face, I smile too. I feel good knowing I did something effortless and simple to build someone else up and make them feel better about themselves.

There is no greater gift you can give than kindness and unconditional love. Love is not saying I only want to be around you when you act the way I want you to act and speak in a way I want you to speak. To have a relationship like that, you would have to write a book and fabricate the characters from your own pen where you create every action by each character and plan every word of every conversation. Give people a break and stop expecting people to act as you wish. That sounds more like bullying to me. And, if your one who threatens others that you will end the relationship because it is not 100% the way you want it, maybe you would be better off on a little island completely alone. I am not talking about tolerating abusive or harmful actions, I am talking about repeated confrontations with everyone you come in contact with. Have you asked yourself if maybe you are the problem? Maybe you should. How do others react to you? Are they happy, angry, frustrated? It’s worth it to take an honest look.

Remember the power you hold to change someone’s life. The question I have for you is this, will you change it for the better or will you make it worse?