Improvise

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Traditional meditation has not been a friend to me lately. That monkey in my mind is putting up one heck of a fight. The more I focus on fighting back, the less able I am to throw a punch. Thoughts haunt me all the time. Remember that movie Groundhog Day? My life is just like that but in my head. It plays over and over until I get it right. I am like a dog chasing my own tail, going round and round and left feeling tired and dizzy. What if I would have said something else? What if I did this instead of that? Perfection is my addiction.

Tonight I grabbed that monkey by the tail and I took control. Want to know how?

Earbuds. Well and a little calming music.

I have been spending time in quiet solitude when I needed more noise. The right kind anyway. There are a handful of songs that touch me so deeply that I am too busy feeling to actually think. Is there a lesson to this? Absolutely. Try until you get it right. If something is not working in your life, stop trying that and do something else. Improvise until you find that something that will take care of the job. Every problem has a solution, you just have to be creative.

Help! I Can’t Sleep

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I didn’t sleep a wink last night. I watched the clock change before my eyes as I struggled to find a sense of quiet that would afford me the opportunity to drift off to sleep. Isn’t it amazing how we can walk into a room in the middle of the day and have no idea why we are standing there in the first place? Then something magical happens at nightfall and everything becomes crisper and clearer. It’s as if the brain magically over magnifies every single thought that races through my head. The tiniest situation feels like a major ordeal in the middle of the night. I toss and turn and fight the voices in my head searching for some solitude from the noise that’s keeping me awake. What do you do to help you fall asleep? How do you quiet everything down so you can drift off to a peaceful sleep? I have tried the voice led meditations in the past and they have worked well but I am not the only one in the bed. I am looking for some suggestions and solutions for those nights that feel like they are never going to end.