We have the power to cripple the people in our life but we also have the power to teach them to fly. I can do this with anyone who crosses my path. So many of us don’t know what love is supposed to look like. We want so much to be needed that we fall into a pattern of making the people around us needy. We gain this sense of purpose when we can fix things or save people from uncomfortable circumstances. We cannot even see that what we think is love is crippling the people we claim to love. Love is guiding and nurturing but it’s also teaching and encouraging the ones we love to walk on their own. How did I miss it before? Holding someone back is not love. Encouraging someone to be less than they can be is not love. Love is letting go and allowing people to be. Doing something for someone who can do something for themself is crippling. We have to understand love and recognize what it looks like. We have to define it, make a list and check it twice to know for certain whether our kind of love is crippling. It’s a scary thought but we have to look it in the eye and make the decision to grow the people we have in our lives. Are they growing , shrinking or standing still because of the way we are loving them? Tough question to think about but time to ask.
They say thoughts become things. There is one thought that has changed the way I view my life and the people in it. Not long ago, I was obsessed over what could go wrong. My panic and anxiety were stemming from the anticipation of when and where the ball would drop. It was robbing me of the present moment and eliminating any chance of peace and happiness I had. I started actively focusing on my thoughts. It became clear in a short amount of time, why I was in the state I was stuck in and I committed to changing my inner dialogue. Once I realized I had a choice, that choice became clear. I could focus on what was wrong or I could focus on and celebrate what was right. Slowly but surely, my anxiety disappeared and I started to find joy again in the little things. I also learned to surrender what I could not control and embrace the things I DID have the control to change. My thinking is far from perfect but its improving steadily every day. I am grateful for my openness toward change. Change is the one thing we can count on so why not welcome it right? Remember to choose your thoughts carefully. They really do matter.
This is the captain speaking. Buckle up while I put the plane on autopilot. Let’s just see where she goes today.
I think I’ve decided you can’t fix stupid. You can’t reason with it, change it or even influence it. Much of what is going on in our simple little world is just plain stupid. We say whatever feels like rolling off our tongue, we insult and demean with no consideration of who is on the receiving end. We spew our opinions as if they hold more value than anyone else’s. It’s disheartening to watch. I feel I have so little power as I sadly watch humanity, respect and civility self destruct. My prayer is simple. Raise me up above the petty nonsense that destroys relationships and even lives. Raise me up above the need to be right or louder or better or smarter. Humble me to know my place in this world is not less or more important than anyone else’s. Help me hang on a little bit longer and share whatever I have left to give. Help me shine and be a beacon of light in a world where the light is sometimes fading and growing dim. Help me be a better person each and everyday. That is my purpose. That is my journey.
Some days there is a brutal battle between my mind and body. One part of me wants to sit in peace while the other part incessantly reminds me why sitting is not an option. The mind is a powerful thing. Learn to tame it or it will take control over you. Repeat after me…peace is good. Thoughts are generally a waste of time. Take that walk. Enjoy the outdoors. Practice inner peace. It’s okay not to have a plan or agenda. It is healthy to take time to rejuvenate your soul. My intention today is to allow peace to fill me up and I extend that intention to you as well. Be at peace. Be the peace the world desperately needs right now.
It’s very hot here today. Earlier I found myself floating in the pool thinking there was nowhere else I would rather be. It’s taken me several years but slowly and surely I have learned to relax. In this fast paced, busy world so many of us struggle to find a way to relax. Feeling calm and allowing ourselves to rest have become a thing of the past. I read Facebook posts about friends spending the entire weekend running from one sporting event to another and I cringe at the thought. Some have every week of the summer planned out but for me and my family, summer is a time to recover and rest. The day doesn’t have to be jammed with activities for life to be meaningful. All these activities and ridiculous things we tell ourselves we have to do are just things. Peace of mind and a moment to just breathe will be much more beneficial than a schedule that leaves us feeling drained and exhausted. It’s almost as if the notion of balance has been lost. I’ve been chasing it my entire life and I’ve worked hard to find out what that means for me. So today, find the balance you need. Learn to say no to the things that don’t really matter and yes to the things that do. You may think those decisions are impossible to make but you have way more control than you think.
I walk a minimum of 5 miles a day. On Thursday I walked ten. I love to be outside and feel the sun on my back and the wind in my face. A year ago, I suffered from anxiety and depression to the point I thought I was going to break. I thought the only way to escape it would be to find a way out of my skin. I felt trapped and helpless and the light at the end of the tunnel grew extremely dim. One day I made the decision that I had to break free from the prison I had created for myself. I couldn’t live that way anymore because it didn’t feel like living at all. Walking offered a new hope, a calm that I had been running after for quite some time. Today a neighbor I had never met before stopped me to discuss the opinion he had of my yard. He didn’t stop to to say hello or even to tell me to have a nice day. That is what the world has become these days.
This post is a reminder to everyone who takes the time to read it. You only see the 5 to 10 miles I walk in my shoes each day. What you don’t see are the miles that wear me down as I fight and struggle to be happy in a world I don’t even feel is where I belong.
Life is short.
Mind your own damn business.
Smile at someone.
Don’t judge others shoes or think you have any clue about the path that others walk. You only know what you see and looks can be quite deceiving. Be a nice person and offer someone hope and keep your opinions to yourself.
The world needs more compassion and kindness and less criticism and resistance.
More love and less arguments.
More happiness and gratitude and less bitching.
More smiles and less scowls.
More hope and less despair.
Be the light in someone else’s tunnel.
The world needs you now more than ever.
I need you.
Be the light in someone else’s darkness.
Be the difference.
“When a flower doesn’t bloom you fix the enviroment in which it grows, not the flower”
– Alexander Den Heijer
Happiness, not in another place but this place…not for another hour, but this hour.
I read an article recently where the writer challenged the readers to follow these simple words. Only love today. That will be my mantra as I pick and choose what I will hold onto and what I will let blow right through. These are some steps you can take today to turn this concept into reality.
1) Don’t join any argument you are invited to. Simply move on and spend your time on something worthwhile.
2) Pass over negative comments and posts on social media and limit the time you spend there.
3) Just for today,turn off the news.
4) Think of at least one thing you can do today to make a positive difference for each person in your house.
5) Speak and think only loving thoughts. Keep the rest to yourself.
6) Look for flowers, not the weeds. It’s easy to notice things that are wrong about people, today look for the things that are right.
7) Repeat this mantra at least once an hour.
8) Believe that your attitude and behavior can change the world for the better.
9) Don’t react. Use your head and respond respectfully.
10) Be patient with yourself. Change doesn’t come overnight.
Only love today and that includes how you think about and treat yourself.
Who’s in? Be the change.