I have tried to make this point before but I believe it is important enough to mention again. Your words, what you say, define who people think you are. Whether or not your words are consistent with your actions, is whether or not people will find you honest and trustworthy. If you don’t intend on doing what you say, simply don’t say it. It’s that easy. Don’t tell people what you think they want to hear, tell them the truth. They will respect you more at the end of the day.
Today is a clean slate. When we leave yesterday behind and we allow tomorrow to begin tomorrow, today offers so much hope. Today is whatever you want it to be. The question is, what do you want it to be?
My mantra for today: Today I will be still. I will allow the things I cannot change to flow through so they do not cling to me. I will make a choice to let them go and trust that everything is okay the way it is in this moment.
I guess if you have an original take on life, or something about you is original, you don’t have to study people who came before you. You don’t have to mimic anybody. You just have a gut feeling inside, an instinct that tells you what’s right for you, and you can’t do it in any other way.
Everyone stop and take a deep breath. Pause. Ask yourself, how am I feeling today? It seems that generally we just expect the worst from everyone. We are so defensive that it may cause us to miss opportunities to connect with people around us. What has happened to us all? How did we get this way? Why do we feel the need to be on the defense? We have stopped feeling like we can trust the people around us. We have to question their motives before we can have a simple conversation with them. Even when we get a compliment, it’s hard to decide if someone is being serious or if someone is passing an insult in our direction with a cool voice and a smug smile. We need more kindness. We need more friendliness and complements and gestures that show we are still caring human beings. We have to prove ourselves again, as silly as that sounds. What if we could expect the best from everyone? What if we were motivated from the heart instead of our self-serving minds? People are not horrible. Not all of them. I’ve been fortunate to know so many amazing people. They come and go. That’s just the way life is but they are there when I need them and that is what counts. Everyone serves a purpose in our life. We may not understand it at the time but everyone we meet has an effect on who we are. Think long and hard next time you speak or act. What kind of effect do you want to have on the next person you meet? I suggest you make it a good one.
“Your life does not get better by chance, it gets better by change.” –Jim Rohn
I decided to choose a new mantra today. Eventually I get to the point where something has got to change. Sometimes it is simply my thoughts that are dragging me down. It’s so easy to wallow in self pity when I have a tough stretch but when I can’t change what’s going on around me, I have to change the way I perceive what’s happening around me.
Today, I will have faith that everyone will handle their responsibilities without my getting involved.
That was my mantra today and I repeated it over and over again until I finally believed everyone would be just fine without me. As crazy as it sounds, my son was able to do his homework on his own and my daughter survived the school day after all the drama with her friends over the weekend. I am sitting here for the first night in a long time where I don’t have to help someone do something. And you know what? It feels fantastic.
Sometimes, all you have to do is believe everything will turn out alright. I always say, when you expect the worst, you get the worst, so if you want better, believe it really will be better.
We cannot control our circumstances but we can choose how we respond and adapt. As the pendulum changes direction and is slowly working its way back up, I am grateful for the hard times because when they finally do pass, I appreciate the good days even more.
“The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man.” -George Bernard Shaw
Over the years, I have recognized that keeping my word is important and necessary. If my words are not consistent with my actions, then my words mean nothing.
It’s been hard for me to have respect for someone who says one thing and does another. It is a breach of trust that is hard to repair and it takes a great deal of time to build back up. What you do and what you say determines if someone will find you trustworthy and believable. It’s so important to speak the truth even in situations that are difficult. Speak who you are and not who you want to be and don’t say things that you think someone else wants to hear. Own your words and follow through with your actions. Remember to do what you say and say what you’ll do.
Yesterday, I took my daughter car shopping for the first time. She has always been naive when it comes to someone’s genuine intentions and taking someone at their word. I’m guessing yesterday she finally learned. One of my biggest disappointments when it comes to another human being is when there is a lack of trust and continuous lying. Boy did we ever get a terrific example on our adventures with salesman last night. There was one in particular that really took it too far. We were actually seriously discussing driving home in a new Jetta that was never even on the lot to begin with. Of course we wouldn’t know that because the salesman told us we were test driving the particular car he led us to believe was the exactt model for the exact price we discussed. All lies. I can tell you this, as a paying customer who puts a lot of time, care and effort in making the decision to commit to a car, once I lose faith and trust in someone, regardless of how much I want something, including a car, I am done. I am walking out and you are not making commission on me. I hope my daughter learned something important about people yesterday. And I hope that young man a learned a lesson or two himself. Honesty and respect are two very important factors when it comes to the success of any relationship. When these aren’t present, no deal, walk.
Daily prompt: trust
Taking that step to walk on your own, courageous and confident, look how you’ve grown
Ready to listen to your own inner voice, there are always two roads, always a choice
Ups and downs, you will surely discover, stay true to yourself, you will always recover
Shy away from advice and do what you know, mistakes will be made, you’ll continue to grow
Truth be told, this much is true, the one you depend on should always be you
I learned something very important about trust tonight. Trust is something that happens over a period of time. It is not instantaneous and has nothing to do with how much you love a person. It is a build up of consistency that determines how comfortable you are with another human being.
Tonight I was driving home with my daughter. She has only been driving a few weeks but not enough to take away the palpitations in my chest or the throbbing dread in my head. I love her to death but the truth is I am scared to death riding in that passenger seat. I just don’t trust her yet, especially when my life is literally in her hands.
When my husband drives, I feel much different. Sometimes I take my pillow along, put my seat back, close my eyes and go to sleep. Trust is a wonderful feeling when life and repetition allow it to happen, but is also something that cannot be rushed.
I want to give you a perfect example of what probably happens on a daily basis. My husband has been away on a work trip in California. Today, he is flying home. He sent me a text earlier telling me that the man in the seat next to him was Pacey from Dawson’s Creek. Okay, this used to be my favorite show, so I text him back telling him to find a way to get his picture. He texts back that he was mistaken about the dude sitting next to him, but that Celo is actually sitting up front in first class. Me? I text back “neat” and proceed to post it all over facebook…kidding, but imagine if I had. The next text points out again he was mistaken but he was sure he saw Train in the airport (that just happens to be my favorite band). This time I wasn’t buying it. What can we learn from this silly story? Let this be a reminder of how we often blindly believe what someone tells us. I mean, why wouldn’t we right, because most of us are honest. Well, I’m here to remind us, that plenty of people aren’t. AND…the important part, sometimes the people we BELIEVE are honest do NOT always tell us the truth. That’s all I got folks! Oh wait…I just checked my phone!