I had a tough moment that made me pause and look within which is sometimes a really hard thing to do. I had a conversation with someone today who was judging a person really hard for some words that were spoken. I thought to myself, what if God judged me for every single word that comes out of my mouth as the reality hit me that He does. I am human which automatically means I am so far from perfection when it comes to speaking. I struggle more and more each day to choose my words carefully but believe me when I tell you it is a full time job. I know the effort and dedication it takes and still there are times when I completely slip up and get it wrong. How many times can we see the error in someone else’s words yet we do nothing to bridle our own tongues from speaking words out loud that should never be spoken? Why is our inclination to judge another persons words while at the same time we are so careless with our own? This is a reminder today that the focus should be on the words we speak and so much so that we do not have the the slightest desire to judge words that come from any other. It seems like a simple concept so why do we struggle so hard with this one?
I read a story today about a young boy who took his life because of some kids who humiliated him for having a colostomy bag. When I see this onslaught of condemnation toward fellow human beings I cannot for the life of me understand how people still don’t get it. Your words, your public and social bullying, your judgement and even your opinions could very well be responsible for killing another human being. When your blame and assault leaves someone in such despair that he takes his own life, do you really not get it? What matters more to you? Insulting a young person on Facebook and comparing him to someone who has done something horrific…getting your likes and cheers from like minded people…is that more important than someone’s life and dignity? Are people really a joke or the latest headline? What if YOU were that person being jeered at? What if it was your child? Do we have to partake in this ugliness and why? What purpose does it serve for the one who does it? I am far from perfect but I value life and I honestly do try to make corrections when I see the error of my ways. If there is someone who needs to read this. If maybe there is a chance it reaches one person, feel free to share. It’s time to change the world and take it in a new direction. Will you join me?
Today I challenge you to prove that your words mean something. If you say you are going to do something, follow through and back it up with action. Only when your words and actions are consistent will you ever attain any goal. I hear so many people say they are going to do something only to cancel or give some excuse as to why it never happens. Who wants to be predictable in that way? You are better than that. Hold yourself to a higher standard before you don’t believe a word that comes out of your own mouth. You are better than the excuses you tell and the people in your life deserve better than that too. Prove to yourself and eventually others that your words are filled with more than nonsense. I’m judging you hard on this and I am holding myself accountable as well. If you make a commitment, follow it through even when you don’t feel like it or this will become the latest bad habit that’s holding you back.
Here’s something to ponder. Maybe it’s not someone’s words that are so offensive but rather our interpretation of the words. This could clear up some serious misunderstanding and conflict. If we don’t like someone, we are probably more apt to interpret their words in a negative, unflattering way. Just a thought.
Two people can hear the same words but understand them to mean something entirely different. Just last night I told my son to turn the heat down to 71 degrees and he set the air conditioner to 71. He heard something different than what I said. No ones really at fault, our minds just work different ways. Remember that next time you get yourself crazy over someone’s words.
It started off innocently enough. I walk 5 miles a day and today I just wanted to change it up so I decided to go to the mall for a change of scenery. There was a young girl working a kiosk and she called me over to sample a facial cream. What do you do she asked? When I told her I was a stay at home mom she asked how old my kids were. When I mentioned my youngest was 15, she replied “Oh, you’re lazy.”
For years I’ve felt myself cringe after that simple question. What do you do? As if the job I hold gives any indication of who I am. People don’t seem to care about that these days. They don’t care what kind of heart you have or the amount of you you’ve willingly sacrificed to have some semblance of a good marriage and family. I don’t judge other people or how they live their lives and I would appreciate it if people would keep their opinions to themselves. What kind of world have we turned into that we feel it’s okay to not only insult and judge a total stranger, but one we are trying to get to buy our product? It makes me sad to be around people. I have a kind heart and the best of intentions but there are some mean spirited people out there that think their behavior is acceptable while they stand there and size me up and judge me by what I do for an occupation. I feel like printing a a t-shirt that reads,
I do nothing.
I am nothing.
Then we can skip the conversation and get on with getting on. The truth is I never ask that question because I just don’t care. Where you work is where you work period. I don’t think any one person has more value than another because of what job they choose. What I do is my business and to that clueless girl selling lotion in the mall, my job is to do me and I will have the respect and humility to let you do you. I am really feeling discouraged today but I will bounce back. Even when I mind my own business and keep to myself, I feel accosted by the mean-spiritedness of others. I’ve finally had enough. We live in a world of mean, opinionated bullies who will never learn the art of shutting their mouths because they feel it is their right to bulldoze anyone and everyone. I’m out. I’m done. Not my game, not my kind of people. I will not allow people like this into my life. Not on a daily basis, not on social media, no place where I am ever again. I will not stay silent to be peaceful anymore. Sometimes people need to be put in their place and unfortunately, they are the same people that never are.
Just be kind and if you can’t manage that, do us all a favor and just be quiet.
I bought expensive shampoo because I am having some serious hair issues. Yesterday I squeezed too much out of a bottle that is already almost empty.
Our time is like that too.
We only have so much of it and when we waste a chunk of it carelessly, we can’t open up our lives and pour that time back in. It’s easy to think we are spending our time on something meaningful and important. We long to change the world and leave our mark long after we’re gone. The thing is, how do we know what is important to the heart and what feeds our need for power within? I know my heart longs for connection. Our actions and our words and our crusade to change the world is breaking down those connections a little more everyday. We are the sum of our parts and when some of our parts are broken off because of our own actions, we can never be whole. Just something to think about today.
I was driving my son to school this morning and hearing the few words he managed to mutter through his mouth caught me by surprise.
“Can’t you talk about something I do that’s good?”
Silence. That was my reaction. He was tossing my own sermon right back into my face and I sat there engulfed by my own guilt. I’ve felt that same way before. I do so many things right so why do the people I love point out the few things I do wrong? When I’ve needed support, I too have received tough love and criticism. There’s nothing worse when you’re already down than someone trying to keep you there.
This is a reminder to everyone including myself that our words come with consequence. We have to pick and choose words that inspire others and lift them up. We have to consciously be aware whether we are focusing on someone’s positive or dwelling on their negative. Don’t we all need more conversations about how awesome we are and how much we already do that’s worth mentioning? Be a light and use your words to make someone shine today. Focus on the positive and watch someone grow right before your eyes. Will you join me?