It’s one of those nights I feel trapped. I just want to tear out of this body and run far, far away. There are moments I need to escape. The thoughts, the depression, the anxiety, all of it, I Just need to step outside myself and get some fresh air. Wishing for something impossible will only lead to more frustration. I’m not used to being behind and constantly running to catch up. I’ve always been the type of person who had everything and more done well in advance. Parenting a child who is always behind the ace ball is continuously challenging. The amount of responsibility I feel is crushing me, one bone at a time. If my anxiety had a voice, the sound would be deafening. There is that line in the sand between where our kids end and where we begin and unfortunately the wind has blown that line away. I do my best to help him anyway I can with school but I am a human being who needs a break. Everytime I start to breathe, there is another assignment missing or a test to re- do. I have a full time job trying to stay on top of it all and if I take a moment to step away… more work! More missing papers. More projects and papers to write. I didn’t ask for a child who would struggle in school. I didn’t ask for this to become our whole lives. But what do I do? Give up on him? Do I not do my part like the ones who turn their cheek at school even when they know he is entitled to these accommodations? I’m sorry. I’m venting but if I keep it inside it will eat me alive. I can do this. I’ve got my back and I am a sure thing. I just need a little sleep and a new day.